Gundam Tales
by Kali Desarai
Summary: Do you love Gundam Wing? If ya do, you'll love this! Just all out funny, dont let the format the story is written in stop you from enjoying the craziness of the G.W. boys and our crazy hosts!
1. Operation Tomato: The Development

Chapter 1, Operation Tomato: the Development  
  
*Entrance* Reno, Kali, & H.G Heero  
  
Kali: Well, what should the 1st chapter of Gundam Tales be about?  
  
Reno: Gundam Wing of course!  
  
Kail:* rolls eyes* I know it will be written in this format, I just don't really know what to write the 1st episode about.  
  
Reno: What should we name the first episode?  
  
Kail: Let me think.* assumes thinking position & Heero drapes arm around her shoulder *  
  
how bout,  
  
Gundam Tales: Episode 1:The Beginning Reno: No,No,No,No, how bout Operation Tomato?  
  
Kali: Operation Tomato!?!....................... I love it!  
  
*Heero snickers and Kali whacks him w/a newspaper*  
  
Ooooooo! The main part could be called the tomato spree! We can throw tomatoes at Relena, Dorothy, and Wufei!  
  
*Wufei appears out of thin air and glares at Kali*  
  
Kali: or not *Wufei disappears*  
  
Reno: * searching the internet for a Girlfriend & doesn't hear a word Kali says *  
  
Come Again Kali?  
  
Kali:* Glares at Reno* I'm not gonna repeat that! Heero might hit me back if i whacked him a 2nd time * Heero smiles mischievously * Just as Kali returned the look *  
  
Reno: sick perverts , get a room!  
  
Kali * stuffs newspaper down Reno's throat * Shut Up! * Heero backs her up by hitting Reno a few times *  
  
Reno: * pulls newspaper out of throat and starts laughing hysterically at the funnies *  
  
Kali: * Gets pissed * Don't be an ASS! * suddenly perks up* Hey we could use this as like a prologue to the 1st Episode or something!!!!  
  
Reno: Duh! That's what i was planning  
  
Kali: * Rolls eyes * Don't be a jerk * Heero gives Reno the look for buggin Kali *  
  
Reno: * dies from Heero from Heero's trademark look * * starts singing * Lean on me when your not strong I'll be your friend , I'll help you carry on for it wont be long till I'm going to need somebody to lean on............!  
  
Kali: * Gives Reno a weird look * Where did that come from?!  
  
Reno: * grins * Actually I got it from the recording I made of Heero singing in the shower. Wanna copy? Only $99999.95  
  
Kali: * rolls eyes * Honey , I have all his singing sessions on tape * Heero nods * Oh, by the way don't let your bro get his grubby hands on our fic. Don't let him change it!  
  
* unnoticed by Kali Reno and Heero leave *  
  
Reno* gets in the Viper with Heero to get Kali's sanity pills , lock's doors and looks at Heero lustfully * I have been waiting to do this for a long time * turns chibi and Heero sweatdrops * * Reno holds up tickets * Lets go play miniature golf  
  
Kali: * holds up a set of keys and gets in the trunks , then crawls through the back seat! * HA! * Heero smirks at Reno's foiled plans and puts arm around Kali *  
  
Reno: * hog ties Kali and gags her * * In a evil voice * Nothing will stop me from playing golf with Heero!  
  
Kali: * is ungaged by Heero * Why can't I play too!?! * turns chibi and gives Reno a sad , puppydog look*  
  
Reno: I guess its ok * turns back chibi * but i need some male bonding time with Heero  
  
Kali: * smiles * Yay! * looks at Reno than at Heero * Um, could someone unite me please?  
  
Reno: * Unties Kali and then pulls up to fancy hotel with a pool a mini golf course etc.  
  
All: ALL RIGHT! YEAH! YAY etc  
  
Kali: * smiles spots a limo pulling up, gasps in horror, then grabs reno & Heero & runs inside *  
  
Reno: * looks at Kali weird look* What the bleep are you doing?  
  
Kali: * looks at Reno in fear * It's a .................... Monster! We have to hurry and check in ! * Grabs Reno and Heero once again and drags them to the front desk * The $ bedroom Penthouse, please complete with kitchen , living room , you know the works!  
  
Heero: * gives Kali a weird look * Isn't that a little much?  
  
Kali: * grins and pulls a piece of paper from her back pocket.* Turns to young girl at the front desk * Here's my certificate saying we get the 4 bedroom Penthouse and everything FREE FOREVER * Gets insane look on her face and cackles madly *  
  
Reno: * sees girl get out of the limo* it;s and angle.................. * Looks more closely * AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH It's RELENA!  
  
Kali: * screams * you called it an angle! What's wrong with you ?  
  
Heero: Turns pale white , A bellboy comes up and grabs our stuff and say follow me. * Heero grabs Reno, Kali and bellboy & drags them to the elevator before Relena can see them*  
  
Reno: I didn't realize it was her! Besides i am now going on a quest to find a G/F and there is  
  
nothing you can do about it, Unless you please cook me some lasagna!  
  
Kali: * rolls eyes * I'll make you some lasagna. * Reno begins to sing [ all for the glory of lasagna ] as Heero's eyes light up  
  
Heero: * almost drooling * I love your lasagna , Kali make sure you make a lot of it! * said with more enthusiasm than he had shown in a month *  
  
Reno: * gets mad and beats Heero off with a stick * I get 9/10 of it  
  
Heero: * Grabs newspaper from earlier * and whacks Reno with it * Oh! No you Don't!  
  
Kali: * rolls eyes * Oh brother * sees bellboy is in danger from Heero and Reno , Grabs him and gets off the elevator * Come on show me to our room.. * looks behind her *  
  
Heero: * sees Kali and bellboy and comes to beat the bleep out of the bellboy .*  
  
Kali: * grabs Heero, Let go of the bellboy, who takes the lead. Reno follows behind on crutches *  
  
All: * reach room and stare in awe at it's hugeness. Bellboy leaves *  
  
Reno: * grins wickedly , and pulls chemicals out of nowhere and makes flashpowder which a bottle cap full is stronger than 2 lbs of dynamite and sticks it down Heero's pants *  
  
BOOM!  
  
Kali: Glares at Reno * Fine! No lasagna for you! * helps Heero to the couch  
  
Heero: * flashes a wicked grin at Reno when kali wasn't looking *  
  
Kali: I was just going to make you each 1 pan.  
  
Reno: * turns * chibi but her kicked me in the nuts with his steel toed boots  
  
Kali* Eyes soften and she turns to Heero * Now Heero, you can't just go around doing that * points to Reno* Now apologize to Reno  
  
Heero: * looks sorry* Sorry.  
  
Kali: * looks at Reno* Say your sorry , too or i wont make you the 18x18 pan of lasagna, Heero already gets one for apologizing.  
  
Heero: * Flashes Reno another wicked grin when kali isn't looking *  
  
Reno: * Apologizes 6 times hoping to get 6 pans of lasagna *  
  
Kali: * nods Okay, now i will go cook you guys 1 pan each. * looks at Reno * I already have the ingredients, This place has been filled with everything we need. * goes to kitchen and begins cooking *  
  
Reno: * wants to whine, but decides against it * I guess I'll go go pick on the bellboy or just go blow something up while i wait  
  
Kali: K! * looks at Heero and grins * wanna help me cook!?!  
  
Heero: * Grins back* Sure.......... HEHE!  
  
Reno: * blows up Relena's limo while screaming evilly The lasagna is all mine!!!!!!!  
  
Kali: * Hears explosion * What was that?  
  
Heero: * turns Kali back to unfinished lasagna* I don't know! FINISH FOOD!!!!!!  
  
Reno: * comes back in the room covered in gunpowder * I forgot to tell ya, Relena will be staying here for awhile * looks down at feet with is hands behind his back, in chibi form* I kinda blew up her limo  
  
Kali: * thinks* Well, I suppose that , that means more torture Time * grins evilly *  
  
Heero: * at first glares at Reno, then listens to Kali's reasoning *  
  
Yeah, more torture  
  
Reno: * whispers to Kali * After while, can we go to the mall with 8 stories and 900 stores & leave Heero Home?  
  
Kali: * Turns Chibi* but why can't Heero come, too? * tears up*  
  
Heero: Glares at Reno for makin Kali tear up. * Kali makes him go sit down *  
  
Reno:* whispers again * words Operation Tomato  
  
Kali: * looks confused * why can't Heero join and what exactly is Operation Tomato ?  
  
Reno: Lets eat first, and put 200 sleeping pills in heero's food then we'll talk. I will brief you and well choose code names for walkie talkies.  
  
Kali: * looks even more confused then realizes Reno wants to drug Heero , Glares at Reno*  
  
Grrrrrr. I don't wanna drug my baby! * Gives Reno His lasagna. . Heero's already piggin out on his*  
  
Reno: hit him with a club then! The plan won't work with him there!  
  
Kali: Well tell me the plan , Then i will decide  
  
Reno: Several Words: Duo, Relena, Tomatoes, Reno, Sabotage, Kali,heero,Pretend to come on to. When we meet up with Duo , I'll tell you the rest,  
  
Kali:* realizes what Reno means and gasps in horror* No! you cant do that to my Heero '  
  
Relena! That's torture!  
  
Reno: * pulls out a trombone * HeHe opps! Wrong pocket. * tosses trombone to the side and pulls out trumpcard * You get to see Heero in a Thong !  
  
Kali: * Raises eyebrows in surprise * What do you mean "thong" give me more details! I definitely don't want MY Heero coming on to * shudders* Relena in a thong!  
  
Reno: The thong is black with red lips on it, Plus Relena wont see him in it , You just haven't seen what happens when Heero wakes up after eating lasagna and thinks nobody's home!!!  
  
Kali: * confused yet again *  
  
Reno: More words for ya: Heero,Thong,Music,Home Shopping Network,Bottle of wine and roses, and if that doesn't work then I still have 1 last card to play!1!  
  
Kali: * Realization dawns on Her* OMG! I can't wait to see the video tape! It's like the fic I'm Too sexy ' all over again!!!!!!!! I love that Fic! *Snaps Fingers* Let's do it! * snickers *  
  
Heero: * looks up from lasagna, looks at Kali, shrugs and goes back to lasagna*  
  
Reno: My last card was: We have a balcony * hint hint* and a private swimming poll, Hahaha  
  
kali: * looks slightly confused, but nods anyway*  
  
Reno: And so beings Operation Tomato : The Preparation!  
  
The End of  
  
Chp.1  
  
( A/n ) There is a theme song but it will be chapter 3  
  
Kali: Hey this is Reno's cousin i wrote everything that says kali and heero before it  
  
Reno: And i wrote everything that is said by Reno Oh yeah at the start of chapter 2 heero still hasn't been put to sleep but it will come so don't think we where forgetting about operation tomato which is a 5 part series ( chapters 1-5 ) And please Review 


	2. Operation Tomato: The Preparation

Chapter 2  
Operation Tomato: The Preparation  
  
*Enter Kali and Reno*  
Kali: As you remember from last time, we tried to figure out what to do for  
our fic. In the end, I was a little confused.  
Reno: *snickers * A little?  
Kali: *pulls out a highlighter* Watch it buddy.  
Reno: *pulls out the highlighters from the war with Johnny Jay*  
Reno & Kali: Don't ask.  
Kali: *pulls the lid off of hers* Don't start with me bud! I'll sick Heero  
on ya! *Background appears. Still in hotel room. Heero is oblivious to  
everything, still eating his lasagna. Kali and Reno move to living room.  
Kali glances back at Heero* Dang! I think I made him to much lasagna. He'll  
never be done!  
Reno: *dies in fits of laughter and starts on his pan of lasagna*  
Kali: *growls at Reno, but since she didn't make him that much lasagna, he  
finishes quickly and Kali recaps her highlighter so it doesn't dry out.*  
Reno: * beats Heero with a stick and steals his lasagna*  
Heero: *growls and attacks Reno, knocking him to the ground. *  
Reno: *goes to CiCi's and eats 19 slices per minute and stays for 12 hours.  
*  
Heero: *smiles happily and attacks his lasagna instead*  
Kali: *rolls eyes * Oh brother. Reno's gonna be sick.  
Reno: *leaves CiCi's and goes to the Japanese Steak House, then McDonald's,  
then Sonic, and then cleans out the grocery store. * There. I'm full.  
Kali: *taps foot waiting for Reno to get done eating. Pulls out a  
calculator and calculates how many slices of pizza Reno had. Kali's eyes  
widen in shock* 13.13. 13,680 slices! Woah!  
Reno: *reappears * Lets start Operation Tomato.  
Kali: *looks at Reno like he's an idiot* Don't we have to prepare first?  
Reno: *looks at Kali weird* That's what I said. Lets go get Duo and prepare  
for Operation Tomato.  
Kali: *glares at Reno * Idiot! You said lets start, key word start!  
Operation Tomato! We can't start without preparing first! * crosses arms  
across chest* Oh, by the way, Duo's in the kitchen wrestling Heero over the  
last slice of lasagna.  
Heero: *pulling on one end of the pan * Give it back! It's mine!  
Duo: * pulling on the other end* You've had 7 pans already! Give me this  
one little piece!  
Reno: *walks past Heero and Duo and eats the last piece * Okay, now I'm  
full!  
Kali: *snickers *  
Heero & Duo: *look at empty pan, then at Reno, then back at empty pan*  
Duo: *growls* Hey, that was mine.  
Heero: * glares and says in low voice * No, it was mine.  
Heero & Duo: * simultaneously drop pan and attack Reno, shouting  
obscenities *  
Kali: *starts laughing and drops to the floor laughing really hard*  
Reno: ..!  
Heero & Duo stop  
Reno: * laughing his head off*  
Duo: What's so funny.  
Reno: * stops laughing* Operation Tomato.  
Duo & Kali: * join Reno in laughing*  
Heero: Huh?  
Suddenly Duo and Reno disappear with various screams and shouts.  
Heero & Kali: * eyes widen*  
Kali: * shouts* Hey! I thought I was supposed to be apart of that!  
Heero: * shakes his head and eyes Kali. Mumbles something and the only  
words heard are 'no one's home' and 'have fun' *  
Kali: *eyes widen again * Duo! Reno! Save me!  
Reno: *voice is heard from far away* He's your bf, I think you know how to  
deal with him.  
Kali: * eyes widen even more* You a-hole! I'll get you for this! *looks at  
Heero in fear *  
Heero: * grins and pounces on Kali*  
Kali: * sighs and decides to accept the situation* Might as well have some  
fun while Heero is in the mood.  
Reno & Duo: * at the hotel's public pool* Well thank God there's music out  
here. We don't have to hear the screams.  
Kali & Heero: * come down to the pool*  
Kali: * smiles at Reno and Duo* Thanks for givin us some time together!  
Heero: * glares at Reno and Duo* There weren't any screams.  
Reno: * underbreath* No, it was all moaning and grunting.  
Heero: *looks thoughtful * Yeah, it was all that.  
Kali: * grins wickedly* We were having a lot of fun, though! I mean, first  
he did me, then.  
Reno & Duo: Stop!!!!!  
Heero: * looks at Reno and Duo funny* What? We were just.  
Reno: I said stop!  
Kali: Come on! It was just a back massage! He did my back, then I did his!  
God, you guys are pervs!  
Reno: * trips Heero making him fall into the pool*  
Kali: * perks up * Hey! We could play chicken!  
Reno: I am not putting Duo on my shoulders!  
Kali: * rolls eyes* I figured that! We'll find you some girls!  
Heero: * gets out of the pool* Yeah! It'll be fun!  
Kali: I know Duo will have no problem, but you on the other hand.  
Heero: * snickers*  
Reno: *finds a very beautiful woman with silver hair and deep blue eyes.  
Looks at Heero in a confident way *  
Heero: *rolls eyes and puts arm around Kali *  
Kali: * raises eyebrow then mumbles* Guys and their testosterone.  
Reno: * looks at Kali* Is it that noticeable? Well she is hot and in a  
bikini.  
Kali: * rolls eyes again* Yes. * looks at girl* What's your name?  
Reno: * in a daze and drooling anime style *  
Kali: * rolls eyes again*  
Girl: * smiles at Reno* Merai  
Kali: Nice to meet you Merai. I'm Kali and this is Heero. * points to Reno*  
Do you even know his name?  
Merai: * smiles and nods* It's Reno.  
Kali: Ooookay. * pushes Heero into the pool* He he.  
Heero: *surfaces and pulls Kali in*  
Reno: * laughs. Pushes Merai into the pool, and then grabs Duo's braid and  
slings him into the pool.* HAHAHAHA!!!!!!! I AM THE LAST EMPTY HEADED ANIME  
CHARACTER STANDING!  
Kali: * shouts * Damn straight! *laughs hysterically*  
Duo: * grins wickedly and pulls Reno into the pool* Ha Ha!  
Reno: Ok that's it! * shouts* WATER WAR!! * dunks Kali*  
Heero: * shouts* Hey!! * attacks Reno to save Kali*  
Merai: *gasps * You just didn't! * goes to attack Heero, but Kali, now  
fully recovered, intercepts her*  
Kali: Oh no you don't! * attacks Merai*  
Duo:* trying to sneak out and gets caught up in it all *  
All: Oh no you don't! * all dunk Duo and get back to the war*  
Duo: *sneaks out and is seen with 2 blonde bimbos*  
Kali: * grins wickedly and pulls out a water gun* He he. * shoots Reno with  
the gun*  
Reno: * yells* Hey! * pulls out his own water gun and shoots at every one*  
Water Gun Fight!  
Heero: *glares at Reno * You're on! *pulls out his own water gun and shoots  
at Reno*  
Kali: *shooting everyone and knocking people into the pool * APPLE CIDER!!!  
Reno: * surfaces in the pool and gasps* Its Kali's battle cry. Watch out!  
Kali: *is the only one left standing* I win!!!  
Heero: * climbs out of the pool and walks over to Kali* Yeah yeah.  
Reno: * grins * Lets go play truth or dare.  
All: Okay! * go into their room. Hear various noises from Duo's room*  
Kali: Oh boy.  
Heero: *wraps an arm around her* We'll get them.  
Reno: * snickers and points towards a pile of shaving cream bottles* Yeah.  
Merai: *laughs * Why would you do that?  
All: *look at her like she's crazy* Because.  
Merai: Oh.  
~All head towards living room, and begin to play truth or dare.~  
Reno: Who wants to start? *there is a knock heard on the door. Reno goes to  
answer it*  
Heero: I think the baka should start.  
Kali: * leans up against him* Reno? Hell yeah.  
Reno: * comes back. A guy with dark brown hair and light brown eyes is with  
him* Kali, this guy says he knows you.  
Kali: * eyes widen* Lou!  
Heero: * glares at Lou, then looks at Kali* How do you know him?  
Kali: * looks sheepish* Umm.  
Lou: * grins at Heero* We're old friends.  
Kali: *qcs* Lets start the game!  
Reno: Hell yeah! *looks at Heero * Truth or Dare?  
Heero: Dare  
Reno: *grins wickedly * I dare you to go strip to I'm To Sexy for Duo and  
his bimbos!  
Heero: * shrugs* Fine. *leaves and music is heard from Duo's room, along  
with various shouts *  
Kali: * rolls eyes* Oh boy.  
Heero: * returns. Has a fistful of cash. Kali looks at him suspiciously *  
They enjoyed it.  
Kali: Sure.  
Heero: My turn. *sits next to Kali who moves away, closer to Lou. Heero  
growls * Okay Lou, Truth or Dare.  
Lou: Truth.  
Heero: How do you really know Kali?  
Kali: * gasps*  
Lou: * grins* We've had fun from time to time when a certain cold hearted  
boyfriend decided to be distant.  
Kali: * punches Lou* Ass. * looks at Heero, who grabs her and drags her  
into their bedroom. *  
Reno: Oh boy.  
Merai: Is she gonna be okay?  
Reno: Yeah. Heero's just gonna screw her senseless so she won't go to any  
one else.  
Lou: * pouts* Unfair.  
Reno: * hears no sounds from Duo's room. Grins* It's time.  
Merai: Yay!  
~ All sneak into Duo's room, carrying many shaving cream bottles. Come out  
and throw them away, and sit down to wait~  
Heero: * comes back pulling a dazed Kali behind him*  
Reno: Is she okay?  
Kali: * glares at him* Yeah. And I see you guys already decided to do the  
job without us.  
Reno: Sorry.  
~ All hear screams coming from Duo's room. The bimbos run out  
clutching their clothes, shaving cream giving them beards, underwear, and  
covering their boobs. Duo runs out saying Wait! And glares at the group. He  
has dried shaving cream covering his hair and on certain, areas.~  
Duo: What the hell do you think you're doing!  
Reno: *laughing* Gotcha!  
Kali: * grins* Dude! Couldn't have done better myself!  
Lou: *looks at Kali* Really?  
Kali: * smiles at him, but Heero prevents her from saying anything by  
kissing her*  
Lou: * glares at Heero*  
Reno: * looks from Heero to Lou* This is gonna be one hell of a time!  
~enter Reno and Kali~  
Kali: Well we hoped you enjoyed episode two!  
Reno: It isn't like the original, cuz' someone *glares at Kali * lost the  
original copy, so we had to make up the last part with what we remembered.  
Kali: * glares back* Ha ha. Well, if this wasn't to your liking, just stay  
tuned, and you'll definitely love chapter three!  
All: * wave * See ya soon! 


	3. Gundam Tales Court

Gundam Tales: The 3rd Installment  
Gundam Tales Court  
Hey folks! Ya know the characters from Gundam Wing don't belong to me,  
*begins weeping.* soooo standard disclaimers  
apply!!!  
  
*Enter Kali and Reno*  
Kali: *Waves* Hello everyone! Welcome back!  
*cricket,cricket*  
Kali: *looks at Reno who is messing with his shoelaces. Clears her throat*  
*cricket,cricket*  
Kali: *kicks Reno*  
Reno: OWWW!!!  
Kali: We've started, doofus!  
Reno: Oh! Hi everyone!!  
Kali: *nods in satisfaction* This episode is guaranteed to be action-  
packed!! It'll definitely fulfill your every laughing need!  
Reno: *in fear of being kicked again* Yeah!  
Kali: *nods again* Let's begin!  
*Room darkens*  
  
*Enter Reno, Kali, Lou, Heero, and Merai*  
Reno: Well, that list got a lot bigger!  
Lou: And so did you!!  
Reno: Bubbie!! *pounces on Lou*  
Kali: *rolls eyes* Oh boy.  
Lou: *pushes Reno off* I have a proposition! I wish to make a motion to  
change my name!!  
Kali: *looks at Reno, then at Lou* To what?  
Lou: *looks kinda embarrassed* To ( )  
Reno: *debates* Heero, what do you think?  
Heero: *shrugs* As long as it's stupid, I don't care. *suddenly a light  
bulb appears over Heero's head* Hey! What about Sir Flogalot?!  
Reno: *laughs ass off*  
Lou: *gets pale and hides lotion*  
Kali: *flushes and mumbles* Hey, I do that for him!  
Heero: What!!!!!  
Kali: *jumps* Nothing! *q.c.s.* Anyway, I think we should do something.  
I mean, Reno and I got to choose our names, so why can't Lou?  
Merai: *nods in agreement*  
Kali & Merai: Though we do like Lou. It kinda grew on us.  
Reno: * whispers to Merai*  
Merai: Nevermind.  
Heero: I like the name Lou!  
Kali: I do, too! I didn't at first, but it grew on me!!  
Merai: Hmm... what to do!?  
Lou: Please change it!  
All: But we like your name!  
Reno: Gundam Tales Court! I'm the prosecutor, Kali is Defense, Merai is the  
judge, and Heero is the jury!!  
Lou: That's not fair!1  
Reno: No, it's the law.  
Announcer 1: Welcome to Gundam Tales court!  
Announcer 2: We enter G.T. Court today with newcomer Lou standing on trial.  
His defense attorney, the lovely Kalihari Desarai, will try to get the  
judge and jury to change Lou's name to Aiden.  
Announcer 1: Yes and Reno Kri, prosecutor, will try to, well, keep it Lou.  
Well, Bob, today is a promising day of laughs, law, and court!  
Bob: Yes George, today we shall see the best and the brightest of G.T.  
battling it out over a name!  
George: I can't wait!!  
Bob: Shhh!! It's starting!  
Baliff: The defendant, Lou, and his attorney Kali. *they enter* The  
prosecutor Reno. *enters* All stand for the Judge Merai and Jury Heero.  
*all stand as Merai and Heero enter and take their seats.* You may be  
seated. *all sit*  
Merai: *shuffles some papers. Is wearing a black robe and a white powder  
wig.* The issue at hand is the changing of Lou's name to Aiden. Prosecutor,  
you may begin with your opening argument.  
Reno: *stands and walks around his desk to the jury. He is wearing a button  
up shirt, jacket and tie, and shorts and sneakers* I'd like to call Lou to  
the stand.  
Merai: Uh... okay. Baliff...  
Baliff: *is busy messing with his gun and handcuffs*  
Merai: *clears her throat and waits a moment.* DUO!!!!  
Duo: *jumps* Uh... right!!  
Lou: *stands. Is wearing blue jeans (WOW!) and a vest. Walks over to Duo*  
Duo: *scratches his head* Um... do you... *begins to mumble*  
Lou: *nods* I do.  
Merai: Take the stand.  
Lou: *looks confused* Uh... okay. * takes the stand and begins to run off*  
Merai: *alarmed* NO! I meant sit down and let Reno question you!  
Lou: Oh okay! *Puts stand back and sits down* I think you know this isn't  
fair. The judge is the prosecution's girlfriend and the jury hates me 'cuz  
he thinks I'm tryin' to steal his girlfriend, my defender. *mumbles* 'Cuz I  
am!  
Heero: *glares at Lou.*  
Lou: *gulps*  
Reno: *missed the entire scene* So... I deem you No name until the end of the  
trial.  
Trowa: *stands from in the audience* Hey!! That's my name!  
Reno: *Puts Trowa with Bob and George. Turns back to Lou* Why do you want  
to change your name?  
Trowa: *interrupts* Yay! I'm commentary! *goes serious* Well, things sure  
are heating up her in G.T. Court!  
Bob: Yes Trowa, they sur-...  
Merai: SHUT UP!!  
Announcers: *shy away* sorry...  
Lou: *shrugs* I just don't like Lou.  
Kali: *stands. Is wearing an untucked button up shirt, a short skirt, and  
army boots* I object!! Prosecution is leading the witness!  
Merai: * looks at Kali strangely* Uh, no he isn't.  
Kali: *flushes* Oh, uh, sorry. *sits back down*  
Heero: *smiles at Kali. He's wearing a black robe, white powder wig and  
mustache*  
Reno: Heero's gay and Lou is fine... case closed.  
Kali: *stands* I object! Heero isn' t gay and Lou... okay so he is fine, but  
Heero isn't gay!!  
Reno: Is too!!  
Kali: Not!!  
Reno: Too!!  
Kali: Not!!  
Reno: Too!!  
Merai: *throws gavel at Reno* ENOUGH!!!  
Trowa: * whips out a remote control and hits pause. The gavel stops just  
inches from Reno's head.* Well, Bob, things sure are heating up here in  
G.T. Court!  
Bob: *looks confused* Uh, yeah Trowa. *leans over to George and whispers* I  
gotta get me one of those!!  
Trowa: *pulls out extras and passes them around*  
Bob: Cool!!  
George: Thanks!! Anyway, our attorneys seem to have gotten off the subject  
at hand.  
Bob: Yes, they would appear to be arguing over whether or not Jury Heero is  
gay!!  
Trowa: Wow!  
George: What?  
Trowa: * had moved down on the floor* I didn't know Kali wore smooch lips  
underwear!  
Bob: Oh boy...  
Trowa: *walks over to Reno*  
George: *hits the play button on his remote* OOOHHHHH!!!!! Trowa is hit and  
down for the count!!  
Bob: Well George, it's back to the court room drama!  
Trowa: *is on the floor with swirls in his eyes* Uggghhhh...  
*Kali and Reno stop arguing*  
Merai: Back to the subject at hand! Lou's name! *motions to Reno * Bring me  
my gavel!  
Reno: *picks up gavel and takes it to Merai. Takes his place in front of  
Lou once more * Lou is a cute name and I don't think you want the name  
Rachel, now do you?  
Lou: What?!  
Heero: *laughs ass off*  
Kali: Are you done? *glares at Heero*  
Heero: *shuts up*  
Reno: Yeah, your witness.  
Lou: Finally! A voice of reason!  
Kali: *looks at Lou funny* I think Lou is an awesome name!  
Reno: *stands and cheers*  
Lou: Hey! You're supposed to be on my side!  
Kali: * goes to Reno and slings an arm around his shoulder*  
Reno and Kali: *begin to dance and sing* Louie, Louie, OOOOOOhhh baby..  
Watermelon watermelon. Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah!  
Merai: *rolls eyes* Kali, do you still wish to defend, well, the defendant?  
Lou: *gives Kali puppy dog eyes*  
Kali: *Sighs* okay... *mumbles* you owe me big... *goes back to her side* Lou,  
why don't you like that name?  
Lou: It's gay.  
Reno: No, Heero is, but that is off the subject. *turns to Merai* Hey,  
baby, can we get a bite to eat after this?  
Kali: Stupid A-hole!  
Merai: Talk to "my" baby like that again and I'll hold you in contempt!  
Lou: Kali, I want your body...  
Heero: *punches Lou* Never!  
Merai: I call a recess.  
Kali: *gets mad* Apple Cider!  
Reno: Holy God its her battle cry! *refer to water gun fight*  
Kali: *rolls eyes*  
Merai: 10 min. recess.  
All: *go outside and begin to play on a playground across the street.*  
Reno: *brings up knee grabbing incident*  
~Flash Back~  
Reno: *is grabbing Lou and Kali's knees*  
Kali: Uh, Reno, that's not my knee...  
Reno: *goes pale*  
~End~  
Kali: *flushes* uh....  
Heero: *glares at Reno* You didn't...  
Reno: *hold hands up* It was an accident!  
Heero: *attacks Reno*  
*Bob and George are swinging on a swing set watching the chase*  
Bob: Well, George, it seems even the recess will be action-packed!  
George: Yes, Bob! It would seem so!  
Reno: *is being chased by Heero* I would like to take this time to have a  
word from our sponsors!  
Man in suit: Hello hello! My name is Fred, and I am the spokesman for H.G.  
Heero( plushies. We are running a special! Four for the price of eleven!  
Kali: Yay!  
Lou: NO! What about H.G. Lou( Plushies?  
MIS2: *pops up out of nowhere* HI! I'm Ed, official spokesman for H.G. Lou(  
Plushies Inc. *shuffles in a briefcase and pulls out papers* Well, Mr.Lou,  
it would seem that sales are booming in our competition, H.G. Heero(  
Plushies Co., and our sales are steadily dropping.  
Lou: WHAT!!!!  
Heero: *snickers*  
Kali: *puts an arm around Lou* Its alright Lou. If it makes you feel better  
I have some of your plushies!  
Heero: *stops snickering* WHAT!  
Kali: *looks at Heero sheepishly* Sorry!  
Reno: Well I got news for you all!  
MIS3: It seems that the Chibi Kali Chasing a Chibi Reno with a Knife while  
Reno is Crying( Plushy is out selling the H.G. Heero and H.G. Lou sales by  
10%!  
MIS3: And the Kali in Nothing but a White T-Shirt and Red Lips Thong( is  
doubling all of them!  
Kali: *jumps and cheers* Yeah!  
Lou and Heero: *nod solemnly and each pull out a Kali plushy*  
Kali: *flushes*  
Merai: *looks at watch* Alright! Recess is over!  
All: Awwww!  
Reno: Come on! 5 more minutes!  
Merai: *Shakes head* Sorry, but I wanna get this over and done with.  
Reno: *sighs* Oh well...  
All: *return to court room*  
Duo: All rise!  
All: *rise*  
Duo: You may be seated!  
All: *sit*  
Bob: Welcome back to G.T. Court!  
~  
Kali: *is sick and tired*  
Reno: Sorry guys, we were writing, but Kali is sickly... and I MISS BUBBY  
LOU!!!!  
Kali: *Sniffles* Sowry Guys...  
Lou: And I aint there right now..  
Heero: and since Lou got here I haven't gotten any!  
Reno: *raises eyebrow* Got What?  
Heero: You know!  
Reno: Not really...  
Heero: Its good and hot and you can get it in a bag!  
Reno: *gasps and slaps his head* Why didn't you call me!?  
Heero: Cuz I wanted it all to myself...  
Kali: But Weno wikes popcorn...  
~  
Reno: The short sickly intermission is over! *qcs* Do you haate  
constipation? Yes? Well, now I introduce my brother, brought into the fic  
for some bashin!  
Deo: Hi!  
Kali: *looks around* I make a motion we kick Deo out.  
Merai: *nods* I second that motion!  
Heero: All in favor say 'aye'!  
All except Reno and Deo: Aye!  
Kali: *turns to the boys* Sorry! Bye Bye Deo! *waves. Turns back to  
everyone* Time to return to court!  
Reno: Yahoo!!!  
*Court has resumed. Kali has resumed her argument*  
Kali: I have no further statements or questions. *sits down*  
Merai: You may go sit down, Lou.  
Lou: *nods and sits down*  
Merai: Now the jury and I will go and make our judgment. *they leave*  
Lou: Yay! Heero's gone! *turns to Kali* I like your skirt, Kali...  
Kali: *rolls eyes* Thanks..  
Bob: Wow, George! I didn't know you coul....  
George: Shhh! We're back!  
Bob: *jumps* Oh! Wow, Lou better watch it! He's in dangerous territory!  
George: I agree!  
Bob: Well back to court! The judge and jury are back!  
Merai: We have made our decision. Lou, stand.  
Lou: *is trying to seduce Kali*  
Merai: Lou...  
Heero: That's it! *jumps over banister and runs to Lou and punches him*  
Stand up you Ass hole!  
Bob: Ohhhhh!!!!!!! Lou got it!  
George: Yes Bob.  
Trowa: *snickers* Yes George.  
Lou: Okay! *stands holding face*  
Kali: Oh my...  
Merai: *nods* Thanks. Now Lou, you judgment. Your name is officially....  
*hear drum role*...................................... Lou!  
Lou: WHAT!  
All except Lou: YAY!!!!!!!  
Kali: *jumping for joy* Yeah! *suddenly Lou attacks Kali. Heero attacks  
Lou, Reno attacks Heero, Duo attacks Reno, and Merai attacks Duo. A giant  
dust cloud appears*  
Bob: Well, George, looks like Kali got nailed!  
George: *snickers* Nailed!  
Trowa: Well folks, you saw it here!  
George: This concludes G.T. Court!  
Bob: Come again!  
All: * stop in mid-fight and wave* Y'all come back now, ya hear! *continue  
fighting*  
~End~  
  
Kali: Hi! Well, as you can see, well... this accomplished absolutely nothing!  
Lou: *pops up* Yeah... I'm still Lou...  
Reno: It appears that this was a waste of time and paper..  
Kali: Yup.  
Reno: this was just a fill in probably our worst chapter!  
Kali: I don't know, I think we'll do better next time!  
Reno: Yeah.  
Kali: Till then!  
Cast: Bye!!!!! 


	4. Gundam Tales Easter Special

Gundam Tales Chap. 4  
What de hell!?!?!?!?  
  
Reno: Welcome to Gundam Tales, * gets sad * Kali I miss the crickets from  
the last chapter  
Crickets: * cricket cricket *  
Reno: uh. Kali????  
Kali: * Jumps up & whacks Reno * Hey! I'm supposed to say the first line!  
It Tradition! * Gets a flash from fiddler on the roof and makes a face *  
uggh never mind  
Reno: * Rubbing head * Jesus! You scared me!  
Kali: Don't worry I wont tell anyone you screamed like a little girl.  
Reno: * eyes widen * you just did  
Kali: Ooops * not * Hey folks! Reno just hit his head on the binder we  
write in  
Sign appears with the words 'Laugh' lights up *  
Audience laughs  
Reno: Yeah, Yeah I know you all might think this tittles a bit weird but in  
honor of Easter, I thought this would be a good chapter  
Kali: * looks at the title * It says What de hell????, Well What the hell  
does that have to do with Easter  
Reno: * Shrugs * but I got a surprise for everyone, including Kali at the  
end of the chapter  
Audience: * no sound * another sign lights up saying cheer  
Audience: Cheers!!!  
Kali: * bows * Thank you  
Reno: Ah! ....... Kali why did we even start Gundam tales?  
Kali: Uhhh ........ I can't remember ......Dude not even!  
Lou: I think yall where just board in church  
Reno: ......!  
Kali: I am just not sure  
Reno: * Flips Through past chapters * I can't find it! * Pulls hair *\  
Kali: * Taps Reno on the shoulder * Uh, Reno you pulled off your wig  
Reno: * holding wig * Ahhh!!!!  
Lou: * nods wisely * Yes Reno wears a wig to hide his head full of hair  
Reno: * Shakes his head as to let his hair flow * Yep.  
Kali: * Light bulb appears and she gasps * Lou is right...... we were board in  
church!!!! * taps Reno shoulder who is still shaking his head * Reno .....  
umm ... that doesn't work you have to much gel in your hair  
Reno: * Stops and blushes * ehh... oh! He He He!!!!  
Lou: Am I the only one that notices we start all our chapters like this,  
with stupid commentary for the first page and a half!  
Reno: * Flips back the chapters again * Yeah, something like that  
Kali: * whacks Lou with the Bamboo Stick * don't make you like Qui  
Lou: * screams * OOOUCHHHHH * Okay Okay! Sorry! The commentary isn't stupid  
Kali: * nods * good!  
Reno: I guess we should start the chapter  
Kali: Since you started the chapter what are we going to do  
Reno: As the title implies we are going to Duo's for pizza. Beer, horror  
movies and only god knows what else  
Kali: What does that have to do with the title  
Reno: Don't know don't care  
Kali: ok  
Kali and Lou: * cheers over the pizza beer and movies *  
* scene fades to black *  
  
Reno: * is seen talking on the phone with Duo *  
Duo: Yo  
Reno: Yo  
Duo: What yall doin for Easter  
Reno: eat pizza. Get drunk, and humiliate Kali as many ways as possible  
Duo: * Gets really happy * all right my place tonight at 8, you bring the  
pizza, Kali, Merai, and Heero, just because I know you know the best pizza  
in the country  
Reno: Yep!!!, well see ya tonight\  
Duo: Yep!  
Later  
  
Reno: *drives up in a SUV followed by 2 more with GT cast *  
Duo: My god Reno what's with all the SUVs  
Reno: It's the pizza, and I borrowed them anyway so thought I would use all  
3  
*one by one 50 large pizzas get poured into duos house *  
Heero: She's mine!  
Lou: No mine  
Heero: Mine  
Duo: Guys lets settle this like men  
H & L: How  
Duo: Pizza eating contest  
Heero: Ok  
Lou: Yeah  
Duo: Ok the rules are simple the winner gets kali  
Reno: On your mark  
Duo: Get set  
Kali: *is tied to a chair on a table *  
Bob: Well it looks like we a have challenge  
George: Why yes Bob it looks like the winner gets Kali  
Kali: Hey I am not a trophy  
Heero and Lou: Yes you are.  
George: I cant believe that they are fighting it out over a simple girl!  
Kali: *starts bouncing up and down in chair* Hey George! Eat foot!!!! *  
kicks George in the face and keeps bouncing, knockin herself off the table*  
oooo...  
~ 1 Hour Later ~  
Bob: Well the score is tied  
George: Yes at 59/59  
Bob: And that's 60 for Heero  
George: Will Lou get 60 he's going ... No Lou has passed out  
B&G: Heero Wins!!!  
Lou: *Runs to the bathroom followed by kali to help him *  
Reno: Holy God the humor  
Duo: Yeah come on out Kali  
Trowa: The Dipping sauces are ready!!  
Lou: Holy Shiz Kali you are so hot  
Trowa: Kali and Lou together  
Lou: I jazzed on the bed  
Kali: What the hell is going on  
* BEEP *  
  
~ Scene Switches to Colored bars running up and down the screen ~  
Reno: Sorry we are experiencing technical Difficulty's it seems the Gundam  
Tales cast has apparently gotten the wrong script please be patient we will  
be back on air in few moments  
~ Scene Re opens to Reno and Kali ~  
Kali: Holy .... Good God, Reno that's the last time I let you do a chapter  
for a long time  
Reno: Well I am sorry its not my fault the cast got the wrong script  
Kali: Good Nite Folks  
Reno: Till next time  
R&K: BYE  
  
At this time I would like to recognize all the cast that will appear  
between now and Chap11 although a lot of the cast are real people me and  
Kali are the only authors  
I will not include guest  
Reno – Jordan DeVooght  
Kali – Victoria Baureis  
Lou – Louie Astorga  
Meg – Megan Butts  
Rei – Rachael Butts  
Dani – Danielle  
Mike – Stephen Cunnigham  
Baker – Mark Baker  
Brain – Brain Hollowell 


	5. The Dating Game: GT Style

Gundam Tales Chapter 5  
The Dating Game: G.T. Style  
*Enter Reno and Kali. Both are yawning and rubbing eyes*  
Kali: Sorry abut the boring ending of the last chapter. We really didn't  
intend for it to turn out that way.  
Reno: *yawning* Yeah... * begins crying*  
Kali: What is it!?!  
Reno: Merai left me for her work!  
Kali: Oh yeah... hence the title! Since Lou is lonely, we decided to host a  
dating game, G.T. style!  
Reno: Yeah! Maybe I'll get one he doesn't choose!  
Kali: *rolls eyes * Brother... Now the commencement of The Dating Game: G.T.  
Style!  
~fades to black~  
~ opens on a t.v. setup similar to the Dating Game. Hear Bob and George  
announcing~  
George: Welcome to The Dating Game: G.T. Style! Our guest today is a  
bachelor from sunny California! He recently lost the lovely Kali to Heero  
and is now searching for a new love! Introducing Lou!  
~ Spotlight appears on Lou. He waves.~  
Bob: Now introducing our 3 bachelorettes! Bachelorette number 1 is a perky,  
up-beat girl from Arkansas. She is creative and loves hanging out with her  
best friend, Kali! Introducing Rei! *Rei waves*  
George: Now for bachelorette number 2! She is another Arkansan, and is  
actually Rei's twin sister! *Lou's mouth drops open and he mouths 'twins?'*  
*Meg waves*  
George: Now our final bachelorette is from good ole Japan. She's fun and  
outgoing, introducing Maya! *she waves *  
Bob: Now introducing your host, Reno!  
Reno: Hello and welcome to The Dating Game: G.T. Style!  
Audience: Hi ya!  
Reno: Whoa, do I get to meet the girls before Lou?  
Kali: No! Now host!  
Reno: Ok, ok! Welcome, welcome, well well what should I do?  
Kali: Make Lou ask questions! Duh!  
Reno: Oh yeah! Well, Lou, got any questions?  
Lou: Yeah, for B1 and B2. Do you guys do 3-somes?  
Both: NO!  
Lou: *face falls * Damn...  
Reno: Crap...  
Kali: Move it along!  
Reno: Oh all right! Next question, Lou.  
Lou: Yeah... Um, B3, do you like whacking?  
Maya: Well, I cant really answer that in public...  
Lou: *grins * Hehe... okay!  
Reno: Sorry Lou! You're outta time!  
Kali: * whispers* Not yet Reno!  
Reno: Oops! Okay, continue!  
Lou: B1, What do you like to do?  
~ B3 begins eyeing Reno. Reno grins and winks at her. She motions for him  
to follow her as she sneaks off stage ~  
Kali: * in warning tone* Reno...  
Reno: Sorry Kali, but duty calls! *he runs off stage *  
Kali: Crap!  
Heero: If I take over do I get something in return?  
Kali: *thinks for a moment * Okay!  
Heero: Yess!  
Kali: * snaps her fingers and Heero is instantly in a black suit, with a  
microphone in his hands* You sexy thing, you!  
Heero: *grins* I know! Only for you, only for you.  
Lou: *sneaks around the wall separating him and the bachelorettes, as Heero  
and Kali continue talking. Looks at them both, then grabs Meg and takes off  
running *  
Kali: What the... HEY!!!  
Lou: *distant * Sorry...  
Rei: * Looks confused and sad*  
Duo: * walks on stage* Sorry I'm late. Trowa and I * Trowa appears* had to...  
*sees Rei. Whispers to Kali * Who's the babe?  
Kali: *motions to Rei * Booish! Come here!  
Rei * gets up and comes over * Yes?  
Kali: Duo, Trowa, this is Rei. Rei, this is Duo and Trowa.  
Rei: * smiles and waves. Little bubbles appear around her* Hi!  
Trowa and Duo: *jaws drop *  
Duo: *jumps to Rei's side* Hi! I'll show you around!  
Trowa: * steps up to her other side* I'll help! *smiles at her *  
Kali: * jaw drops*  
Reno: * sweatdrops* Trowa, you don't stand a chance.  
Trowa: * gets veiny and hits Reno over the head*  
Reno: * is knocked out*  
Maya: Oh no! *drops down to his side *  
Lou: LOL!  
Meg: That looks like it hurt...  
Kali: * glares at Lou and Reno* I CANT BELIEVE YOU TWO! COMPROMISING THE  
INTEGRETY OF OUR SH-...  
Heero: *grabs her * Shh.. * whispers something in her ear*  
Kali: * fumes* Apple Cider... Oh all right...  
Rei: Tee hee! Apple Cider...  
Duo: Yeah, its her battle cry. * moves a lil closer to Rei*  
Trowa: * glares at Duo and moves a little closer to Rei* Its cute, isn't  
it?  
Duo: * glares back at Trowa*  
Rei: I know! * hugs Kali suddenly* That's my boo!  
Duo and Trowa: * look surprised. They then surround Kali and each grab an  
arm. They take her off to the side, and begin talking with her * mumble,  
mumble, mumble...  
Kai: * answers quietly, then skips back to Heero's side *  
Reno: * awake now* What was that all about?  
Duo: * each back on one side of Rei* That's nonya bizniz.  
Trowa: Yeah...  
Rei: * whispers to Kali* Whats with them?  
Kali: *snickers and whispers back * They're fighting over you!  
Rei: Really? Cool! Which one's better?  
Duo: * had been listening* I am!  
Trowa: Nu uh! I am!  
Rei: Kali...  
Kali: I cant say, they're both great guys...  
Duo and Trowa: Thank you!  
Kali: So let 'em fight it out!  
George: Welcome friends! You are now entering the arena for G.T. Mud  
Wrestling!  
Bob: Yes! Today's wrestlers are Kali and Rei!  
Kali: * appears beside Bob. Gets veiny and hits him* Not even...  
Bob: * tears in eyes* Okay okay! One could only wish. The true wrestlers  
are Duo and Trowa!  
Audience: Yeah! Yahoo! Etc.  
Kali: * nods* Better.  
~See Duo enter the ring. Is wearing American Flag Boxers.~  
George: Our first contender had entered the ring! He is a lady killer, with  
his long braid of hair, charming smile, and goofy personality! Presenting  
American Duo!  
Audience: * various cheers and choice boos*  
~Trowa now enters the ring in white silk boxers  
Bob: Our second contender has now entered the ring. He is the silent type,  
but certainly has his own charm with the ladies...  
Rei: * while Bob is announcing* This is really all over me?  
Kali: Yup! This is how we settle things here on G.T.!  
Rei: Ohh... Hey, they're starting!  
~Both turn to see Trowa body slam Duo into the pit of the ring. Duo stands  
and nails Trowa into the pit. They are both covered in mud. Fighting  
continues with Bob and George commenting~  
Bob: Woah! That's one heck of an uppercut Trowa's got there!  
George: Wait! Duo's recovering! He's ...What! Holy cow! Duo literally threw a  
cow at Trowa!  
~Trowa is seen on the ground with a chic in a cow suit on top of him. He  
pushes her off and throws her out of the ring. He then proceeds to grab a  
chic in a bunny suit and throws her at Duo~  
Bob: Ooohhh! It's a direct hit!  
George: Oh! Wait! Kali and Rei are entering the ring!  
Heero: Yes!  
Bob: Holy Guacamole! They're in string bikinis!  
Lou: Yeah!  
Meg: * smacks him*  
Lou: Booo...  
Meg: * gets in the ring too*  
Bob: Yeah! Meg's gettin' in there, too!  
Rei: Hold up little hoochie. This is a Kali 'n' Rei moment.  
Meg: I don't think so!  
Rei: * attacks Meg. Kali joins in and Trowa and Duo just sit back to enjoy  
the show*  
Duo: Woah. I didn't know that chics could fight like that!  
Trowa: Go Rei!!  
~Kali, Meg, and Rei turn to the guys. They look at them for a moment, then  
attack them~  
Bob: Woah! It's all out war down there!!  
George: Fists are flying!  
Bob: Ahhh! Meg has been thrown from the ring!  
Meg: Ughh...  
Lou: * rushes to her side* Are you all right?  
Meg: * nods*  
Lou: * lifts Meg and disappears into the crowd*  
Kali: * stops in mid fight* Hey! Where's she goin!?  
All: * stop in mid fight * Don't know. * shrugs all around and continue  
fight*  
Bob: Wow! Look at that! The fight stops so suddenly and restarts just as  
suddenly!  
George: * rings a buzzer* Times up!  
~The fight stops. The audience throws tomatoes and cabbage at the press  
box.~  
Bob: Yeowch! Watch out!!! Attack of the killer tomatoes!  
George: Hey, that was a kewl show!  
Bob: I know! * gets hit with a tomato-bomb. Is now knocked out*  
George: Bob! * gets hit with a cucumber* Dang you Larry! I'm sorry I took  
you're place! * passes out*  
~Note to all: NO BOB ISNT A TOMATO!~  
~ See Kali, Rei, Duo and Trowa exiting the ring. Duo and Trowa's shoulders  
are slumped~  
Reno: Dude, whats wrong?  
Duo and Trowa: * in unison* We lost.  
Rei: Don't worry boys! You can both still try to win me!  
Duo and Trowa: * cheer up*  
Duo: Yay!  
Trowa: * puts an arm around Rei* Hi there...  
Rei: Hi!  
Duo: * glares at Trowa and glomps onto Rei* Hi!  
Rei: * smiles* Hi!  
~ Duo and Trowa proceed to argue over Rei ~  
Heero: * puts an arm around Kali* You look good in mud.  
Kali: I know!  
~ scene goes to Bob and George who are still dodging tomato, cucumber, and  
cabbage attacks. Each have various bumps and bruises ~  
Bob: * crawling on knees. Has a black eye* That's it for G.T. Dating Game!  
George: * also crawling around* Slash mud wrestling!  
Bob: Join us next time for awesome fun!  
George: * jumps up* Yeah! * gets creamed with another cucumber* Ungg...  
~ scene fades to black ~ 


	6. Haunted House

Gundam Tales Chapter 6:  
Haunted House!  
* Enter Reno and Kali*  
Kali: Hello everyone! *waves *  
Reno: We hope you enjoyed the last chapter!  
Kali: * joins in* And that you'll enjoy this chapter!  
Reno: * nods sagely* You see that Haunted House is the title of this  
chapter.  
Kali: Yup! It's the beginning of October and we hope to have this done by  
Halloween!  
Reno: *cough * Yeah right... * cough*  
Kali: * pulls out Bamboo Stick( *  
Reno: * gulps* What I mean is while we're writing Chapter 6, we only have  
Chapter 1 posted...  
Kali: * nods * Reno isn't very apt at typing, and I didn't have a computer  
for a while, so...  
Reno: You get the picture!  
Lou: * appears out of nowhere* Hey!  
Reno: What!  
Lou: When are we gonna have an appeal for my name!  
Reno: * eyes widen in shock* You still haven't given up?  
Lou: * shakes head* Nope! I'm very persistent!  
Kali: * mumbles* Stubborn is more like it....  
Reno: * snickers*  
Lou: What did you say?  
Reno: * laughs*  
Lou: Shut up!  
Reno and Lou: * begin arguing*  
Kali: *sighs * Okay! We'll compromise!  
Reno and Lou: * stop in mid-fight* We will? * look at Kali, then at  
eachother, then they straighten up*  
Reno: Fine  
Lou: * straightening shirt* Good...  
Kali: * crosses arms and taps finger on chin* Now, what name did you want?  
Lou: Ai... * is interrupted by Heero, who appears out of nowhere*  
Heero: SirFlogAlot.  
Reno: * busts out laughing*  
Kali: * hides smile*  
Lou: * glares * No, Aiden!  
Heero: * shrugs * It was just a suggestion! * moves over to Kali*  
Kali: All right... Hey I know! We'll tag it on the end!  
All: * look at Kali funny*  
Lou: Huh?  
Kali: *rolls eyes * We all * motions to Heero, Reno, and herself* have last  
names, why cant you?  
Reno: Lou Aiden... Hmmmm... Kinda has a ring to it.  
Lou: *thinks on it *  
Heero: Don't hurt yourself, Lou.  
Reno: * snickers*  
Lou: * glares* I like it!  
Kali: *looks up* Bob! George!  
Bob and George: Yeeesss?  
Kali: I have an announcement for you to make. * scribbles something on a  
piece of paper and hands it to Heero to give to them *  
Heero: Be right back. *leaves with a wicked gleam in his eye*  
Kali: Uh oh...  
~Flash to Heero, who is writing on the piece of paper~  
Bob and George: Attention!  
Bob: Attention all G.T. Cast members! Lou's new name is.... George, what does  
that say? Can you make it out?  
George: Umm... I think it says SirFlogAlot!  
Bob: * squints at paper* I think you're right! Lou's new name is  
SirFlogAlot, and he really does! Oh my!  
Kali: Heero....  
Heero: * appears* Hehe... yes Kali?  
Kali: * crosses arms and glares *  
Heero: Okay! * looks at Kali* You're so sexy when you're angry!  
Bob and George: Oh! Change in announcement! Lou's new name is Lou Aiden!  
Kali: * nods* Now that that is taken care of... On with the story!  
Reno: YES!!!!  
~scene fades~  
Reno: Kali? How should I start this?  
Lou: You idiot.  
Reno: What, do you have an idea?  
Lou: It should start with Kali nude in the shower, you know, the shower  
killing scene.  
Reno: Yeah!  
~scene fades to Kali in the shower~  
* Kali is in the shower. The door creaks, and Kali looks around, slightly  
scared. A man grabs the shower curtain. Kali screams and rips the shower  
curtain off and starts using Kung Fu on the man*  
Man: Ow! Ouch! Stop it! Ouch! Kali, it's me, Heero!  
Kali: * looks at Heero* You jerk! * decks him*  
Duo: * pops in* the words are, you lazy pansy ass wimp. * disappears *  
Reno: *sees Kali nude on top of Heero * Nude Bathroom Fight!!!  
Kali: * whacks Reno *  
Lou: Told ya she liked whacking.  
Kali: * frenchs Heero * Only Heero baby. * insert random Hentai*  
Lou and Reno: Oh gross... *They pale *  
Kali: * glares at Lou* What the hell are you looking at!?  
Lou: * gulps* Nothing...  
Kali: * glares daggers* Oh, so now I'm nothing!?  
Lou: I didn't say that!  
Kali: *stands wrapped in shower curtain * So now I'm a liar!  
Heero: * on floor dazed*  
Lou: * stammers * N... Nooo...  
Kali: * steps over Heero and slams the door in Lou and Reno's faces *  
Lou: * steps back, rubbing nose with tears in his eyes* Oww...  
Reno: That was nummy!  
Lou: I know! I got it on tape! * waves tape in air *  
Kali: * opens door, punches Reno, grabs the tape, and slams the door again*  
Reno: Oww...  
Lou: *looking at space where the tape once was * She's in a bad mood today  
isn't she...  
Reno: Yeah... bad for us...  
Lou: Good for Heero.  
Reno and Lou: GOOD FOR BUSINESS!  
Duo: * hauntingly appears* Plushies! *disappears *  
Reno: Hentai plushies, now that's nummy!!!  
Kali: * comes out of bathroom fully dressed *  
Heero: * follows with a slightly dazed look on his face*  
Reno: * eyes widen* OMG!!!  
Lou: * nods wisely* You know she gets crazy when it's a full moon.  
~ Door bell rings~  
Kali: * goes downstairs to answer it*  
Reno: Its probably Kali's pizza boy! * wink wink*  
Lou: No! DON'T MENTION PIZZA!!!!  
Reno: * recalls pizza eating contest* Yeah and When are you going to pay me  
for that pizza?  
Lou: Never!  
Reno: That's what I thought. Now to start the fun!  
Lou: AKA  
Reno: Operation get the girls in funny sexual positions!  
Duo: * appears * Or Haunted House. * disappears*  
Kali: * downstairs* Rei! Meg! Dani! Maya!  
Reno: * upstairs* Maya's here!  
Lou: Meg's here!  
Duo and Trowa: Rei... * look at eachother*  
Trowa: When did you appear?  
Duo: Just now.  
Trowa: * glares* Rei is mine...  
Duo: No mine!  
Trowa: Mine!  
Duo: Mine! * disappears*  
Reno: Im sorry Trowa.  
Trowa: What for?  
Lou: Cant say.  
Reno: Ok! I gotta go to my bedroom.  
Lou: Going to whack?  
Reno: I do that every hour on the hour.  
Lou: That was two minutes ago...  
Reno: Yup.  
Lou: Where at?  
Reno: * snickers*  
Kali: * from downstairs* No whacking you two!  
Heero: * grins* To bad you guys have to do it yourself. I have Kali to do  
it for me.  
Lou: I have Meg!  
Kali: * she and other girls just came upstairs* Like anyone would!  
Girls: * snicker*  
Trowa: * instantly by Rei's side* Hi...  
Rei: * smiles* Hi!  
Duo: * appears* Hi!  
Rei: * screams and jumps on Trowa *  
Trowa: * grins*  
Duo: * glares and disappears*  
~suddenly lights go out~  
Kali: EEK!  
Heero: * puts arm around her* Its okay.  
Lou: Uh... Heero... That's my butt...  
Heero: Aghh!  
Kali: Heero, I'm right here. * turns on flashlight*  
Lou: Hehe... That was kinda nice...  
Heero: * shudders and moves to stand next to Kali*  
Meg: Hey!  
Kali: * passes out flashlights * There! We're all set!  
Reno: * asleep in hall floor*  
Heero: * trips on him putting them in an intimate position*  
Reno: OH that's nice!  
Heero: * slaps Reno like a girl*  
Reno: * wakes up* OH yeah! I brought a friend!  
Kali: * squeals* You brought Stephen!!!!  
Dani: Oh boy... * turns her head to see Wufei standing with a flashlight  
under his face. Shrieks*  
Wufei: Hey!  
Dani: Sorry! * puts hand over her heart* You scared me!  
Kali: Where is Mike?  
Reno: Hehe... He's tied to my bedpost in only boxers!  
Lou: Nummy!  
Kali: Hehe!  
Dani: * eyes Wufei* Don't you think he might be a wee bit scared in the  
dark?  
Reno: EEEK! You're right! * runs to save Mike*  
Wufei: * steps closer to Dani * Thank God he's gone.  
Dani: * nods * Yeah!  
Reno: * pops head around corner* I heard that!  
All: So?  
Reno: Good point. * goes to save Mike*  
~Suddenly all flashlights go out. Flash to Duo, who is in a control room  
snickering. Then he takes a ton of batteries out of his pockets. ~  
Maya: EEK!  
Dani: Its so dar...Mmmph!  
Kali: *pulls out a spare flashlight and flashes it to where Dani was * OMG!  
All: * look to see Dani and Wufei making out in the floor*  
Lou: Woah...  
Trowa: * steps closer to Rei* That was fast.  
~see Duo in control room laughing again~  
Rei: What was that?  
Reno: What?  
Rei: It sounded like ... laughter....  
Reno: No, no you're mistaken!  
Rei: No I heard laughter.  
All Guys: NO YOU DIDN'T! * all look suspicious*  
Kali: Sure, ok. Girl meeting now!  
Girls: *heard whispering amongst themselves *  
Reno: * leans over to Lou* Im getting scared now.  
~In girl group~  
Kali: Okay we know the guys are up to something.  
Meg: * nods* So what do we do?  
All girls: * nod*  
Kali: * looks thoughtful* Okay... Duo's disappeared... which means he must be  
controlling things from the control room...  
Rei: There's a control room?  
Kali: * nods* Okay... Dani, I'll tell you where... * various whispers, nods,  
and okays.*  
All girls: * nod* Lets do it! * return to respective guys*  
Wufei: Where's Dani?  
Kali: * looks around* Where did she go!?  
Maya: Now people are disappearing...  
Reno: * grins and winks at the guys* Its okay Maya.  
Lou: * steps closer to Meg * Why don't we go into a room so we can stick  
closer together?  
* Hear a scream*  
Kali: * jumps* What was that!?  
~In control room. Dani is there bent over something, tying it. She steps  
back to reveal Duo, hogtied and gagged on the floor~  
Trowa: Lets move to a room...  
Rei: * nods * Okay...  
All: * step into nearest room. Kali shines flashlight around the room,  
which is covered in pillows*  
Meg: Wow...  
Maya: Cool! Pillows!  
Kali: Lets have a pillow fight!  
All guys: * fall against wall in surprise*  
~ Control room. Dani grins as she hits a button. The wall the guys are  
against spins and leaves them stranded in a blocked cell.~  
All guys: What the hell!?  
Meg: Hey, where did the guys go? * winks at other girls*  
Kali: * winks back* What the hell. Lets have a pillow fight anyway!  
All guys: * mouths hang open in dismay. Begin pounding on wall*  
Lou: No! Wait! We're here!  
Heero: Don't have a pillow fight without us!  
Reno: Yeah!  
Trowa: Help!  
~Dani in control room. She is laughing her ass off~  
Girls: * suddenly the flashlight goes out. All girls fall*  
Rei: Uhh... that's my butt...  
* back to guys*  
Trowa: * starts crying* I wanna touch her butt!  
* girls*  
Kali: Dani, what the hell did you French me for! Im not Wufei!  
Dani: Meg! What did I tell you about touching me there! Ooo... that kinda  
feels good...  
*guys*  
Wufei: * has hand in the air, opening and closing his hand* Buh... bubuh...  
Lou: * curls up in fetal position* no.. noo... Meg is supposed to do that to  
me!  
Reno: *pulls out tape recorder* I don't know about you guys, but im gonna  
want to listen to this later. * winks* If ya know what I mean.  
*suddenly all noise stops*  
Lou: That cant be good...  
*lights come on in the cell*  
Heero: * gulps*  
* the spinning wall opens and the girls stand on each side, arms crossed,  
on hips, etc. All are laughing*  
Kali: So you thought you had us huh?  
Dani: Ya know, Duo is still hogtied in the control room!  
Lou: No! You got us!  
Reno: * begins to pull hair* Our plans, our plans! * begins to cry*  
Lou: *picks up Reno and holds him in his lap like a baby.* Its all right...  
you still have your tape...  
Kali: * grins and waves a tape in front of them* Not since after I emptied  
your tape recorder...  
Lou: * joins Reno in crying* Noooo!  
~ the girls begin to laugh, and the scene fades to black~  
* Enter Kali and other girls*  
Kali: Well that episode was fun! * grins wickedly*  
Meg: Heck Yeah!  
Dani: * looks at Meg.* Umm... get into the spirit, girl! Its Hell Yeah! *  
does a cheering hand motion*  
Meg: *mimics motion* Like this?  
Dani: *nods*  
Meg: Okay! * does motion* Hell Yeah!  
Rei: * hugs Meg* Finally! My lil sis is all growed up!  
Kali: * laughs* Well in case youre wondering where the guys are... * looks at  
other girls. They all grin evilly, sit down in front of a tv with popcorn  
and turn it on*  
Guys: * on tv*  
Duo: * banging on wall* Let us out!  
Reno: Please stop playin the tape!  
* hear the conversation of the girls in the dark room after the pillow  
fight*  
Lou: * is still in fetal position*  
Wufei: * still makin hand motions* Buh... bubuh...  
Trowa: * still crying*  
Heero: * is passed out on floor*  
Girls: * all laugh as the scene fades to black* 


	7. GT Boot Camp Part I

Gundam Tales Chapter 7:  
G.T. Boot Camp Part 1  
Enter Reno and Kali  
Reno: waves Welcome back! As you can see by the title, this is  
definitely gonna be an interesting episode!  
Kali: Yeah. We just got sent to fanfic bootcamp...  
Reno: Hehe! Just because of those wonderful court, dating game, etc.  
chapters.  
Kali: sighs and crosses arms Yeah, it really sucks...  
Reno: snickers Don't worry Kali! We'll have fun!  
Kali: rolls eyes Yeah right... Well, lets get this over with...  
Reno: cheers  
Fade to black  
2 weeks earlier. Gang appears in court  
Judge: I sentence you all to 3 weeks community service for faking court.  
Reno: sarcastically Well we're faking court right now.  
Judge: throws book at Reno That's 6 weeks of boot camp!  
scene fades back to opening  
All: glare at Reno  
Reno: sweatdrops And that's how we got here. Now to start the fun!  
scene fades to black  
Open on scene. All G.T. cast are on a bus labeled Boot Camp for Crazy  
Fanfic Writers.  
Kali: sitting next to Heero by the window Reno, why did this have to  
happen to us!?  
Heero: glares at Reno  
Reno: hides Im sorry! I don't mean for my mind to be crazy! pouts  
Besides, Kali came up with the Court and Dating Game episodes!  
Kali: sighs Yeah, yeah...  
Lou: rolls eyes  
Wufei: growls What I don't get is why we all have to go instead of just  
Reno and Kali. They are the authors after all.  
All: nod and hear various yeahs, etc.  
Reno: shrugs Cuz it wouldn't be G.T. without you guys!  
All: shrugs, nods, various trues, yeahs, etc.  
Drill Sergeant: No laughing, maggots!  
G.T. Cast: WTF? puts you in mind of a room full of black people and a  
white person says, "Whats up my nigger?"  
D.S: My name is Zechs, and... is interrupted by Reno  
Reno: Did you say you wanna have sex?  
Zechs: 50 push ups now!  
Reno: is seen in a chair with potato chips a remote passing gas  
Lou: Noble Gases...  
Kali: Huh?  
Reno: The 18th family on the periodic table.  
Kali: Duh! pales NO MORE CHEMISTRY!!!!!! screams  
Reno: sighs I just meant a fat person in a lazyboy after thanksgiving  
watching football is like the noble gases, very inactive.  
Kali: stops screaming and sweat drops Oh brother...  
Lou: nods sagely Very true, very true...  
Zechs: stands and yells Shut up! You are now all under my severe train-  
stops suddenly as a remote flys by his head, hitting the driver, knocking  
him out, but not before him hitting the breaks, causing Zechs to fly  
Reno: looks sheepishly Oops...  
scene fades to camp, where Zechs is in a bed, bandaged like a mummy  
Zechs: They're gonna pay... Im going to kill them.  
Reno: is seen outside doing the 50,000 pushups and 50 miles he got for  
the sex comment, the noble gases, the remote chips, the wreck and hitting a  
superior officer.  
Kali: Look at the idiot.  
Heero: looks at the idiot  
Reno: is eating chips in front of "sex"   
Zechs: Maggot, 3 days in the brig.  
Reno: is not seen for a while  
Lou: Just think Kali, no fan fic writing or reading.  
Kali: NOOOO!!!!!! grins suddenly I got a laptop!  
Zechs: takes it away No you don't.  
Duo: Man Reno, there are some hot chicks... Reno? Reno? Where are you?  
Trowa: The brig.  
Duo: Ah!  
Rei: Trowa, will you come give me my nude oil massage?  
Duo: What!?  
Trowa: smirks smugly at Duo Coming.  
Rei: Duo, I need you to give me a bath later.  
Duo: grins All right.  
Kali: pouts But I like my laptop...  
Zechs: glares You are not allowed to write at all! That's the point of  
boot camp!  
Reno and Kali: gasp  
Kali: turns chibi and cries  
Heero: picks her up and carries her to their cabin  
Zechs: Now wait one damn minute! marches up to them and Kali unchibifies  
What makes you think you're rooming in guy/girl rooms?  
Kali: Huh?  
Lou: You're not serious...  
scene fades and reopens on mess hall, where Lou and other guys sit with  
the girls complaining.  
Lou: I cant believe we have to room all guys to one bunk and all the girls  
to another!  
Wufei: next to Dani It's an injustice!  
Kali: looks thoughtful Reno...  
Reno: is devouring the icky unidentifiable meat on his tray  
Kali: growls and kicks him under the table  
Reno: jumps OUCH! looks around suspiciously and covers his food with  
his body, mumbling No one can have it...  
Kali: rolls eyes Reno!  
Reno: jumps and laughs a lil Uh... yeah?  
Kali: You do realize that this is kinda strange.  
Reno: What?  
Kali: We are here at boot camp, not allowed to write... and yet here we are,  
writing this chapter!  
Reno: gasps and holds his head  
Heero: leans over to Kali and whispers I think he tried to think too  
hard...  
Lou: laughs  
Reno: I met a friend. Her name is Theresa. I dub her Ti-sa. She got boot  
camp for talking to me and for her Kurama/Hiei skits in her fics, and we  
had a hot steamy affair.  
Ti-sa: whacks Reno We did not, pervert!  
Reno: crying chibi face I thought what we had was special.  
Ti-sa: Huh? You need help you baka, and how do you eat that stuff?!  
Kali: Amen sista!  
Zechs: appears Tomorrow camp starts. Get some sleep. mumbles  
something  
Reno: Did Sex say I look like a cheese burger or he needs a rise?  
Late that night in the woods  
G.T. Cast: dressed in tribal clothing  
Kali: I hereby declare this meeting open. all back in bunk suddenly  
Reno: Hi my name is Reno.  
All: Hi Reno.  
Reno: And I am a pervert that's hungry.  
All: We know.  
Lou: Hi my name is Lou.  
All: Hi Lou.  
Lou: Same as Reno.  
All: We know.  
Duo: Hi my name is Duo.  
All: Hi Duo.  
Duo: I pimp cacti.  
All: We kno- WTF!  
Kali: rolls eyes Welcome to the first meeting of Boot Camp going Fanfic  
Writers.  
Wufei: rolls eyes Must I repeat myself...  
All: Shut up!  
Duo: looks at Reno Man, whats wrong with you?  
Reno: is pale  
Kali : screams after looking in a case labeled "Real Emergency" It's  
gone!!!!!  
Duo: Whats gone?  
Reno: Lipton Lemon Ice Tea!  
Zechs: burst in Work now! wicked gleam in eyes  
Reno: lightening and frightening music But we didn't sleep!  
Zechs: So?  
Meg: gasps You cant do that!  
Zechs: I can do whatever I want! grins wickedly as lightening flashes  
behind him You're in my hands now!  
All: gasp  
TBC  
Kali: jumps for joy  
Reno: Yippie! Our very first cliffhanger!  
Readers: evil scowl  
Kali and Reno: sweat drop Easy people...  
Bob: Oh my! It looks li-  
Kali and Reno: Shut up!  
George: -like its getting violent down there!  
Kali: APPLE CIDER!!!  
Reno: FROZEN FOOD AISLE!! winks Kali aint so special now!  
Kali: hits Reno Shut up!  
Reno: is passed out on the floor  
Kali: Bye guys! waves  
scene fades to black 


	8. GT Boot Camp Part II

Gundam Tales Chapter 8:  
G.T. Boot Camp Part II  
Scene opens on Reno and Kali  
Reno: Welcome back!  
Kali: This chapter is promised to be filled with fun, laughter, and  
craziness-  
Reno: cuts in And mud wrestling!  
Kali: glares Shut up!  
Reno: cowers Sorry... winks at audience But I have found out my  
carefree attitude and clumsiness makes it hard to keep women.  
Kali: No shrimp Sherlock.  
Reno: Hey, that's my line!  
Kali: Shut up maggot! grins Reno isn't so special now, are ya!  
Reno: points to a room full of black people, then realizes what Kali  
said That was so not nice!  
Kali: snickers You're telling me!  
Scene fades to lightening, music, and Zechs  
Zechs: You're in my han- eyes widen and begins to jump up and down,  
swatting his butt which has been struck by lightening AHHHH!!  
Kali: Oh my...  
Guys: laugh hysterically  
Rei: Oh brother... grabs water bucket which mysteriously becomes full of  
water   
Maiya: takes it from Rei and throws it on Zechs, completely missing his  
butt  
Guys: laugh harder, if possible  
Zechs: glares OBSTACLE COURSE NOOOOWWWW!!!!  
All suddenly out in the rain  
Lady: Now this will be a tough course. It will include crawling, running,  
crawling, running, climbing and some more crawling and running.  
Reno: That's the woman I'm gonna marry...  
Maiya: slaps him really hard  
Reno: OUCH!!  
Lady: My name is Noin, and I am Zechs'- Reno interrupts  
Reno: Lover...  
Noin: 20 pushups now.  
Reno: Damn...  
Noin: 30 more.  
Reno: Drops down to do pushups.  
Fade  
Enter seeing Heero, Kali, Trowa, Rei, Wufei, Dani, Reno, Maiya, Lou, and  
Meg crawling through the mud  
Meg: This is so gross.  
Reno: grins wickedly, picks up a clump of mud and throws it at Kali,  
hitting her in the back of the head  
Kali: stops, glares, and keeps going  
Reno: pouts, then does it again  
Kali: jumps up THAT'S IT!!! attacks Reno. All join in and begin  
wrestling  
Reno: Boot Camp Smack Down!!!  
Kali: APPLE CIDER!!!  
Heero: ...  
All continue to wrestle, throwing mud and performing various WWE moves.  
Noin and Zechs appear. All stop in mid throw and stare  
Kali: Oops...  
Zechs: 200 PUSHUPS NOW!!!  
Noin: Half left face!  
All: follow command  
Noin: Front lean rest position!  
All: pushup stance  
Noin: Sound off!  
Reno: Down, up 1.  
Kali: Down, up 2.  
Heero:...  
Noin: That's 50 more!  
Heero: Down... up... 3.  
Lou: sings Down, up 5!  
Noin: 50 more!  
All: continue doing pushups till all have done 500. It is midnight.  
All: sleep  
Horn sounds at 2 am.  
Kali: groan Oh...  
Heero: ...  
Lou: Kali!  
Kali: jumps up, hitting her head on the bunk above her What!  
Lou: Are you sore?  
Kali: growls Im not so stupid as to put myself in the position to be  
made fun off!  
Lou: snaps fingers Damn... Reno!  
Reno: does the same thing as Kali What!  
Lou: Are you sore?  
Reno: Yeah... oooo...  
Lou: Poor Maiya.  
Kali: Oh brother...  
Heero: Obviously Reno is that stupid.  
Wufei: mumbling in his sleep Injustice...  
Dani: sleeping too  
Zechs: sounds the horn in their ears  
Wufei: jumps up screaming like a lil girl INJUSTICE!!!  
Dani: falls to floor AHHH!  
Reno: laughs hysterically  
Duo: says in sleep Oh cactus!  
Reno: Great. Im sleeping in a room with a danderphiliac, a necrophiliac,  
and a pedifile!  
Dani: Hey! Im not a child and Wufei isn't a pedifile!  
Heero: gets girly Bad mental images...  
Zechs: Reno, you have a package. Its in headmaster Treize's office.  
Reno: gulp  
Kali: Hehe...  
Zechs: laughs maniacally, with lightening flashing once more  
Lou: Don't you remember what happened last time with the lightening?  
Zechs: stops laughing and gulps Hurry up Reno! leaves  
Kali: Headmaster Treize...  
Lou: I've heard stories...  
Meg: nods solemnly I heard he once chained a guy up by his ankles for  
recieveing a package from his mom...  
Reno: gulps again The horror! hear the Psycho stabbing music  
Kali: pats him on the back You best go...  
Reno: But...  
Heero: jerks him up and pushes him towards the door You don't want to  
keep him waiting...  
All: stand at bunk door to see him off Bye Reno... wave solemnly  
Reno: gulps, waves timidly, and turns towards Treize's office  
See Reno enter Treize's building. Hear loud luau music.  
Reno: WTF... enters Treize's office. See Hawaiian decorations all around,  
Noin is hula dancing, as is Lady Une, the cafeteria lady. Zechs is sipping  
a drink from a coconut and Treize waves for Reno to enter  
Treize: Welcome! Don't mind us, your package is over there. points to an  
opened package Hope ya don't mind if we took a few. Your mommy was kind  
enough to send you a carton of Lipton's Lemon Ice Tea.  
Reno: entire time standing with mouth open in shock  
Zechs: snickers We read the card too. makes a sweet face and batts his  
eyelashes From dearest mother with love...  
All: laugh  
Reno: gulps, grabs package and runs  
back at bunk  
Meg: I cant believe he believed it!  
Kali: I know! He is so gullible!  
Lou: Did you see the look on his face?  
All: laugh. Stop suddenly as Reno enters  
Reno: evil twitch  
All: gulp  
Reno: Party!  
All: party till all hours of the night  
Shadow figure: evil laugh  
All except Reno: wake up sick  
Reno: grins evilly Laxatives... do a body good!  
All: run  
Reno: calls after them There is only one bathroom and Zechs and Noin  
are in it! wicked smirk  
2 hours later  
Zechs: Obstacle course, level 4 today!  
All: groan  
Kali: rolls eyes Oh brother...  
Meg: sits down and cries I wanna go home!  
Lou: tries to shush her  
Meg: cries louder  
All: plug ears  
Kali: takes a 2 day old muddy sock and shoves it in Meg's mouth Shut up  
you whiny baby!  
Meg: passes out with X's on eyes  
Reno: laughs  
Zechs: begins pulling at his hair I CANT TAKE THIS!!!!  
Noin: Zechs...  
Zechs: drags G.T. cast out to buses GO AWAY!!!!  
All: cheer  
Reno: looks at Zechs with tears in his eyes Man... leans in for the hug  
Zechs: screams and runs away  
All: laugh  
scene fades  
scene reopens on cast  
Reno: Well that's the end.  
Kali: Yep, just think 8 chapters in 2 years.  
Reno: sweatdrops Yeah...  
Kali: Audience, don't worry about Zechs and Noin, we made them members of  
the cast!  
Reno: Yup! When we start going to-  
Kali: slaps him Shush!!!  
Reno: Well good bye and good night!  
END  
Crickets: cricket cricket Man, we need more money for this! 


	9. Support Groups?

Gundam Tales Chapter 9:  
Support Groups?  
enter Reno and Kali  
Kali: Hi everyone!  
Reno: Glad to see you again!  
Lou: cough Not really. cough   
Kali: whacks Lou with the Bamboo Stick(  
Reno: Don't say stuff like that!  
Kali: Yeah! You'll scare off our whole two fans!  
Lou: laughs Two!  
Kali: glares and waves the stick dangerously Yes and we love both of  
them!  
Reno: sigh Im sorta tired of the same things over and over.  
Kali: Huh?  
Reno: Well it's the same joke every chapter.  
Lou: Yeah, dumb commentary.  
Kali: whacks both of them  
Lou: Oh yes, the whacking is wonderful, Kali.  
Reno: See!  
Heero: joking You guys need support groups.  
Kali: gasps Hey! That's a great idea!  
Heero: dreaded look I was joking!  
Kali: Its too late now!  
All: NOOOOO!!!  
scene fades  
scene reopens on the G.T. cast standing in front of a building. There is a  
sign that says Support Groups Unlimited. All enter. Are seen sitting in a  
lobby, filling out personality tests, turning them in, etc. A lady walks in  
about an hour later, to discuss...   
Lady: turns to face G.T. cast   
Reno: gasps NOIN! pounces on her  
Noin: goes pale and screams LET GO!  
Zechs: runs out of his office What is it!? pales How on earth...  
Kali: Hi guys! Did ya miss us?  
Zechs: puts his face in his hands I should have known you people would  
need support groups...  
Reno: Why are ya'll here?  
Noin: We quit the boot camp business after you left and opened this...  
sighs  
Lou: Aww...  
Noin: rolls eyes Sit down all of you.  
All: sit  
Noin: Now, we have analyzed the results of your personality tests...  
Duo: Huh? see him staring at Rei, and glaring at Trowa  
Noin: Shut up! Now, these results have helped us determine what support  
groups you need.  
Reno: Oh joy. wiggles his eyebrows As long as I'm with you Noin, its all  
good.  
Noin: pushes him away Shut up! when she is satisfied Reno is sitting  
down and quiet, she continues As I was saying, your support groups are  
determined by your personality tests... I will now tell you where you stand.  
First, Meg and Lou. they stand You are in the group for Separation from  
your Significant Other!  
Lou: Huh? hugs Meg  
Meg: What is that?  
Noin: It separates you two so that you can learn to think on your own and  
will learn to handle down time, alone!  
Meg and Lou: NOOOO! guards appear and pry them apart. They are taken to  
separate rooms, kicking and screaming all the way  
Noin: Quatre. he gulps You are in the group for Well-Mannered Inertly  
Angered People. It will help you learn to express your anger.  
Quatre: Okay... is shown to a door and disappears through it  
Noin: Trowa, Duo, and Rei, you're all in the same group. Your group is the  
group for Strange Love Triangles.  
Duo, Trowa, and Rei: Okay! are shown to a room. Duo is stopped  
Noin: Duo, you are also in the group for Bimbo Sex Loving Long-haired  
Freaks.  
Duo: Hey! grabs his braid protectively Im not a long-haired freak!  
Noin: shuffles through some papers When asked what you liked doing on a  
Saturday night, you said having wild 'times' with bimbos and washing your  
hair...  
Duo: So!  
Noin: ... And that you would and actually do both everyday...  
Duo: Oh... is shown back to room with Trowa and Rei  
Noin: You'll be taken out after while for your other group. turns to  
Heero and Wufei Heero and Wufei, your group is the group for Onna-hating  
Males. Onna mainly being Relena.  
Heero and Wufei: Okay! are shown out  
Noin: Kali, you and Dani are in the group for Onna-hating (Relena), device  
using, fanfic writing, insanely violent, hormonal, and out of control  
females.  
Kali: looks dumbfounded Woah... they are taken away  
Reno: What about me!!!  
Noin: Oh, you're in all of them.  
Reno: jaw drops, then grins So, Noin, just how many of these groups will  
I be in with you... alone... wiggles eyebrows  
Noin: hits Reno Too many.  
Group 1  
Noin: Welcome to the Separation from your Significant Other.  
Crickets: cricket cricket  
Noin: Oh yeah! No one is here, they are all separated!  
Reno: walks through a door and sees Lou sitting there, crying, talking to  
a plant  
Lou: I want Meg! cries  
Reno: laughs insanely  
Lou: cries harder  
flash to another room. Noin is there and Meg is there. She is staring into  
space, unblinking  
Meg: Lou...  
flash back to first room, and see Noin and Reno step out into it from the  
two other rooms  
Reno: Noin! attacks her I missed you! This separation thing is killer...  
Noin: rolls eyes Oh brother.  
Group 2  
Noin: sighs Welcome to the Well-mannered Inertly Angered People group.  
Reno: Hey baby have you missed me?  
Noin: No! Well, Quatre, how do you feel?  
Quatre: Fine.  
Reno: Its okay! Let it out!  
Quatre: Shut the hell up you selfish, arrogant, non-understanding asshole!  
throws a lamp at Reno before proceeding to attack him. Smoke cloud appears  
with various fists and being thrown and naughty words are heard  
Noin: sweat drop Next group.  
Group 3  
Noin: has managed to wrestle Reno from Quatre's angered grasp Group for  
Strange Love Triangles. see Duo, Trowa, and Rei sitting on one couch, and  
Zechs on another.  
Zechs: Welcome! gets up and hugs Noin  
Reno: glares at Zechs Mine! grabs Noin. Yet another smoke cloud forms  
Duo: Damn, they're worse than us!  
Trowa: Yeah... puts an arm around Rei  
Duo: Hey! attacks Trowa HELL NO!!!  
Noin: grabs Duo and Reno Time for the next group!  
Group 4  
Noin: tired expression  
Reno: all beat up  
Duo: I AM NOT A LONG HAIRED FREAK! index finger in air But I am a bimbo  
lover.  
Noin and Reno: ...  
Duo: Well, I will start by saying my name is Duo Maxwell and I am slightly  
perverted and I love my hair.  
Noin and Reno: ...  
Duo: I wont call it an obsession, just a hobby.  
Noin: Just shut up...  
Reno: throws left over lamp from Group 2 Shut up you freak!  
Noin: Next group! they leave Duo passed out on the floor, chibi Rei's  
flying around his head  
Group 5  
Noin: The Group for Onna-hating males.  
Heero: I HATE RELENA!!! throws a dart at a picture of her, hitting her in  
the middle of the forehead  
Wufei: AS DO I!!! is seen practicing karate on a dummy that strangely  
looks like Relena  
Reno: Woah! Cool!  
Noin: Sorry! Gotta fly! grabs Reno and moves on to next group  
Group 6  
Noin: The group for Onna hating, device using, fanfic writing, insanely  
violent, hormonal, and out of control females!  
Kali: is seen looking over Dani's shoulder laughing Hi Reno! You so have  
to read Dani's story about a dying Relena! laughs insanely  
A huge pile of papers move, and suddenly, a head pops out of it  
Head: Found it! sees Reno and Noin Hi Noin! I found the fake death  
certificate for Relena!!!  
Dani: Go Kuiya!  
Another head pops out of the pile of papers  
Head 2: Hey! That is so not cool! I wanted to find it first!  
Kali: shakes head Its all right, SumiYuki, you can still help.  
Kuiya and Sumi: climb out of pile and walk over to Kali and Dani  
Sumi: Now it is time!!! laughs maniacally  
Kuiya: On to hacking the government mainframe computers and "killing" her!  
Kuiya, Sumi, Dani, and Kali: YAHOO!!! get to work  
Noin: Okay, next group!  
Reno: There is another one?  
Noin: Yup! One made especially for you! they leave the three females  
working on the computer, occasionally stopping, looking at each other, and  
cackling insanely  
Group 6  
Noin: Welcome to the final group for Freaky Bushy Eyebrowed People.  
Reno: Okay, that's cold. sees Trieze Warden Treize! pounces Do you do  
weddings against people's will?  
Noin: hits Reno  
Treize: Lady, you must learn more about the OZ Organization.  
Reno: She isn't here and this isn't Gundam Wing.  
Treize: Lady, you must be more graceful- more graceful about everything.  
Noin: hits Treize What is it with you bushy eyebrowed people? sniffs  
What is that smell?  
Treize: Oh, that's Dorothy in the closet screwing Reno and Relena dolls.  
Reno, Noin and Treize: scream and run away  
later  
Reno: Hey Noin?  
Noin: Yes?  
Reno: When I asked you if we had any group together alone you said too  
many, but we didn't have any!  
Noin: grins I know!!!  
The End!  
Reno: Hey, that's just cold.  
The End... Again!!!  
enter Reno and Kali  
Reno: That was fun!  
Kali: I know! We made Relena dead in the world government computers! grins  
wickedly  
Kuiya: appears Yeah!  
Sumi: appears too Mmmmhmmm!  
Both: bow Thanks for letting us participate in this chapter of G.T.!  
Kali and Reno: Welcome!  
Kuiya and Sumi: wave and walk away  
Kali: What nice people... I gave Kuiya a ton of plushies for Christmas... I  
would have Sumi too, but didn't know her then.  
Reno: That is bad for business you know.  
Bob: And they're off! hear Kali and Reno arguing  
George: Do they ever stop!?  
Bob: If they did we'd be out of a job!!  
George: Right!  
Scene fades away, hearing Bob and George commentary on Kali and Reno's  
fight 


	10. GT Meets Inuyasha!

Well, a memo for you people who actually read this! Actions are in bold print, they were in asterisks, but everytime i fix it and save, they dont show up on here... grrr... well enjoy!

**Gundam Tales Chapter 10:**

**G.T. Meets Inu Yasha!**

Kali: Welcome back!

Reno: Yes! In honor of our 10th chapter, and future every 10 chapters, we will do a crossover with another anime.

Kali: As you can see from the title, we will have Inuyasha and Co. will make an appearance in this chapter.

Reno: Yay!

Kali and Dani: Hehe… We will have to apply some of our learnings from the Support Group for Onna-hating, device-using, fanfic writing, insanely violent, hormonal, and out of control females.

Dani: In hopes that we don't hurt a certain undead, soul gathering priestess.

Kali: Its not that we hate her or anything…

Dani: Its just that her methods are unclear and very roundabout…

Reno: Yeah! She hurts Inuyasha, indirectly hurting Kagome!

Kali, Dani, and Reno: Death!

Kali and Dani: **gasp and cry** No! We musn't!

Reno: **Kali and Dani in the background trying to gain control of themselves** Now on with the fic!

scene fades

scene opens to a room with a giant floating blob

Reno: Welcome to chapter 10! **gestures to the blob** This is the Super Jelliton Mold Time Transporter of Doomä! **volcano erupts in the background**

All: **sweatdrop**

Kali: If we would have been smart this would have been a Tenchi crossover.

Reno: Why?

Wufei: Why else you baka!

Reno: ??? **clueless**

Trowa: Because Washu could have made something a lot more… nevermind.

Reno: I know you weren't just about to say safe…

Trowa: ….

Duo: He's right, her experiments are dangerous…

Trowa: **sees Duo holding a bottle of hot oil and tackles him** No you don't!

Duo: Help!

Rei: Stop it both of you!

Duo and Trowa: **stop**

Rei: Both of you, hot tub, now!

Duo and Trowa: **run**

All: **sweat drop**

Reno: She so has them whipped…

Kali: **hits Reno** Naw, duh!

Reno: Test subject!** pushes Kali into the jelliton**

Wufei: That was unexpected…

Kali: **beating on jelliton** Let me out!

Reno: Sorry! **hits a button**

Jelliton begins glowing. Kali freezes, looking around. The jelliton shivers, then explodes

Reno: That cant be good…

All: **covered in pink goo** Reno!

Heero: **grabs Reno and picks him up off the ground** WHERE IS MY KALI!!!

Reno: **looking past Heero** Eureka! It worked!

Heero: **drops Reno and turns to see Inuyasha, Kagome, Miroku, Sango, Kiarra, and Shippou standing where Kali had been** Woah…

Inu: Where the hell are we?!

Miroku: Inuyasha, please be more calm. We will figure this out in… **sees Rei, Meg, and Dani** Hello Ladies…

Sango: Oh brother…

Miroku: **walks to Rei, Meg, and Dani**: Will you three bear my children?

Rei, Meg, and Dani: **all hit him over the head** NO!!!

Sango:** laughs** Pathetic. Even girls in this place refuse him.

Kagome: **laughs too**

Inu: **looks at Reno** WHERE ARE WE!?

Reno: **holds up Vulcan peace sign** Welcome to Gundam Tales!

Drums: Da Da Duuuummm!

Kagome: OMG! I love you guys!** looks around** You're obviously Reno, youre Heero, **names all the cast, then pauses **Where's Kali? I really wanted to meet her!

Heero: **looks mournfully** I don't know!! **grabs Reno again** Where is she!?

Reno: Well… if they're here **gestures to Inu and Co**. Then she's…

Heero: **gasps** No! Shes not back in feudal era Japan…

Drums: Da Da Duuuummm!

Trowa: I personally like the drums. Good job Bob and George.

Bob and George: Thanks!

Kagome: **shrieks** Bob and George! **faints**

Inu: Stupid woman…

Wufei: Finally, someone that agrees with me.

Inu: And you're an idiot too. Ive read past chapters.

Wufei: **glares**

Miroku: What did you use to bring us here?

Reno: Nothing but Jello brand Jelliton and a 9-volt battery.

All but Inu cast:** faint**

Miroku: Whats that?

Reno: Food! **says solemnly** Always use Jello brand. It brings the family together.

Inu: Food! All right!

Heero: **hits Reno** Shut up!

Reno: **bump on head and cheesy grin**

flash to Kali, sitting in a tree

Kali: Heero… **sniffles and looks around** This is nice here… **sees Kikyuo** NO! **hits palm against head** Step 1, they are there… Step 2, they aren't necessarily evil onnas… Step 3, you don't have to bash them in fanfics… **continues**

flash back to others. Inu cast has awaken!

Kagome: **staring at G.T. cast in awe**

Sango: So how do we get home?

Reno: By connecting the G-path to the K-path with a 9.587732178910 repeating ratio of nuclear power divided by the subscript 21 while multiplied by a coefficient of 6 with an atomic mass of 3, an electron affinity of 50 with a 12 oxidation number.

All: Huh?

Reno: Basically, I have no clue.

Kagome: **still in awe**

Sango: You know if I didn't find you extremely sexy I would beat the hell out of you. **grabs Reno and pulls him into a bedroom**

Miroku: Wait for me! **joins them**

Reno: No!!! Step 1, I don't want to, Step 2 I am not horny, Step 3 I don't like sex, **slaps himself** What the hell am I saying?! **gives in**

Duo and Trowa: Woah…

Rei: And I thought we were horny…

Shippo: Whats going on in there?

All: **look at Shippo**

Dani: **pats his he**ad We'll explain when youre older.

Heero: **sniffle** I miss my Kali… all our games and fun times…

Lou: **sweatdrops** Did you know she likes it rough?

Heero: **nods **Yeah… I've branded her with bite marks and bruises so many times… **breaks down** I WANT MY KALI!!!

flash to Kali

Kali: **sniffle** I miss my Heero… **is still sitting in tree. She falls. Next seen pushing herself up off the ground, covered in dirt, twigs in her hair, and cuts and bruises** Im going to kill you Reno!

flash back to others

Reno: **spooky feeling, like hes being cursed…**

Duo: Whats wrong?

Reno: Kali wants me dead… **looks at Duo** HEY! WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN HERE!?

Duo: **looks at Reno** Uh… **points**

Reno: **looks and sees everyone** What the fookie?!

Wufei:** rolls eyes** You idiot, you were sleeping.

Reno: **face falls** NOOO!!! **cries**

Sango: **leans over to Dani** What is his problem?

Dani: He was probably having a wet dream.

Wufei: He should have realized it. It was most likely too good to be true.

Reno: Hey!** pauses** So when did I fall asleep?

Duo: After you told us you didn't know how to bring Kali back.

Reno: You mean no threesome? **chibi with big eyes**

All: Naw duh!

Reno:** pouts**

scene fades and reopens on Reno in snow army fatigues

Reno: Operation Retrieve Kali. I need three volunteers, one from the Inugang.

Heero: **stands up**

Duo: **stands up**

Inugang: **pushes Inuyasha up**

later, all in camo, inuyasha in a pink tutu…( don't ask, Reno has lost his mind)

Reno: Well, lets go! **jumps into the remaining jelliton**

Heero: Im coming to save you Kali… **jumps**

Duo: Trowa is going to have all of Rei… I mean fun while m gone… **jumps**

Inuyasha: I don't wanna! **jumps**

Reno: **from inside the jelliton**. Dani! Push the button!!!

Dani: **starts to push the button**

Duo: Wait! Rei, don't have too much fun witho-** disappears**

Rei: **looks at Dani, who had just pressed the button**

Dani: **shrugs innocently** What?

in feudal Japan

Kali: Im tired and hungry… and horny…

guys in feudal Japan

Duo: Hey Reno? First of all, why are we wearing camo, and now that we are here, how do we get back?

Reno: Hell if I know.

Duo, Heero, and Inuyasha: **sweatdrop**

Reno: Hey, Inu.

Inuyasha: What.

Reno: Sesshomaru

Inuyasha: Don't know, don't care.

Reno: You would if you knew Kali's obsession.

flash to Kali

Kali: Argh!

Sesshomaru: **appears and stares at Kali for a moment**

Kali: gasps Uh oh… Dude with giant white… tail… OMG Its Sesshomaru!

Sesshomaru: **sweat drops and turns suddenly** Inuyasha is near… **looks at Kali** They must be looking for you… **grabs Kali and runs toward group**

Reno: **blabbering**

Duo: Reno? … Reno? …. RENO!

Reno: **runs into a large figure**

Sesshomaru: Is this yours? **gestures to Kali**

Reno: Since Heero is not with us currently, Nope never seen her.

Sesshomaru: Okay, she is now my sex slave. I take my leave. **turns to go**

Kali: RENO! ILL KILL YOU!!!

Heero: **hears Kali yelling at Reno** KALI!

Inuyasha: Sesshomaru…

Inuyasha and Heero: **run to them**

Inuyasha: Sesshomaru! Let her go!

Sesshomaru: She is my sex slave, you cant have her.

Heero: **growls** Shes mine! You let her go!

Heero and Sesshomaru: **little lightning bolts between them**

Inuyasha: I thought you detested humans.

Sesshomaru: **sweatdrop. Flash to 3 months ago. Finds a notebook while going through the forest. "whats this?" Opens it and sees Kagome's name. He reads the stories in it. " What an interesting female. I should like to meet her" back to present** Shes mine!

Kali: I feel so loved… **sniffle**

Heero: **looks at her** Hey!

Kali: Sorry! You didn't see the flash back!

Sesshomaru: **sets Kali down, his arm around her tight**ly You will not take her!

Miroku and Sango fall through the air

Miroku and Sango: Aaaiiiieeee!!!

There is a bright light and then all disappears

Reno: Who cut the lights?

Kali: **rolls eyes** Open your eyes idiot!

Reno: **opens eyes to see group back in present**

Duo: **hits Reno** You idiot! It was a time set device! It automatically brought us back, taking the others back to the feudal era!

Reno:** points to Sesshomaru** Then why is he still here?

Kali: The same reason Quatre is with the Inugang…

Reno: Oi…

The End!

enter Kali and Reno

Kali: We hope you enjoyed this crossover episode!

Reno: Sorry about that lil cliff hanger, but we wanted to keep Sesshomaru…

Kali: Sooooo, stay tuned!

Reno and Kali: Love ya! Good bye!

Well peoples, there ya have it, our tenth chapter! Yay! Ive been told that the reason people don't read it is because its written like a play, but honestly, it's a bit easier to write it that way for Reno, hes a bit literarily challenged…

dodges shoe Love you too Reno! Anyways, don't let the way they're written stop you! Oh, and We don't own the G.W. boys or the Inu characters… I thought I might want to put that in there, since I haven't done that since like, the 1st chapter! I just forget… blonde me…


	11. The Tale of the Lost Chapter!

Hiya! I know In the last chapter the actions were in bold, but in this one, im trying it out in italics, maybe it will be better! Please tell me what you think Is easier for you to read!

**Gundam Tales Chapter 10 ½ , 10.5, or 21/2**

**The Tale of the Lost Chapter!**

_Enter Reno and Kali_

Kali: _waves_ Hi guys! I suppose you're curious about the title of this chapter…

Reno: Well let us dissipate the cloud of mystery and curiositly.

Kali: Reno, don't use big words you cant spell.

Reno: I cant use crayon!?

Kali: _pats his shoulder_ Its okay… anyways, to reveal the reason behind the title…

Reno: Yes! Its all Kali's fault!

Kali: Nu uh!

Reno: Uh huh!

Kali: Fine… it was my fault…

_Flash back_

_On Six Flags Over Texas trip. Kali is pulling baggage out of a car. She sets a blue folder labeled G.T. on top of the car as she organizes. Then she goes inside, leaving the folder. Comes back out five minutes later, wind blowing, and seeing papers everywhere. Realizing that it is G.T., she begins chasing papers across four different parkinglots, catches all she sees, then goes inside._

Kali: _knocks on Reno's door_

Reno: Hey! Come on in!

Kali: G.T. decided to go see the sights…

Reno: Huh?

Kali: _tells him story_

Reno: _laughs his ass off _ Have you checked to see if you got it all?

Kali: I was about to… _sits and begins going through papers. 10 minutes later _I got it all, but we're missing one page from chapter 10, and one page from chapter 11.

Reno: No we aren't! _ checks papers frantically 12 times _Holy shiznit you lost 2 pages of 2 chapters! _Screams_

Reno: _Looks at Kali's mom back in Kali's room_ Bye, we gotta find G.T.

Kali and Reno: _go downstairs where elevator stops for 30 seconds between floors _

Reno: Holy shiz this hotel is evil.

Kali's agent: _pops in_ please refer to chapter 11, coming soon to websites near you! _Disappears_

Reno: Ok, that was weird.

_Five minutes later, out in parking lot_

Kali: Shall we?

Reno: Lets go! _Set off to the last place Kali saw papers_

Kali: Reno, is that a paper!?

Reno: It is!

Kali: Run!

Reno: _runs and picks it up_ Its blank… (A/N: the wind was blowing about 30 mph that day!)

Kali: Blast it… _spots more paper_ Reno!

Reno: _runs again_ It's a paper bag…

Kali: Oops, sorry… _sees more_ Reno!

Reno: Im not running this time. _Walks and picks up the paper _It's the page from chapter 10!

Reno and Kali: _cheer!_

_1 hour later, no sign of the page from chapter 11, but have found various cups, bags, and newspapers… and the Goldfish van! Its in the shape of a goldfish with sunglasses and the mouth is the window! Its kinda like the wienie mobile…_

Reno: _sniffle_ Bye Chapter 11…

Kali: Lets write a different chapter 11, then when we remember what was on that page, we can introduce it as the current chapter as the lost chapter 11!

Reno: Okay!

_End flashback_

Kali: _nods _ So now you know…

Reno: _snickers _ You see what a klutz Kali truly is!

Kali: _glares_ And you see what an idiot Reno is! Not that you couldn't already see it!

Reno: _sticks his tongue out at Kali _Im not the one that lost it!

Kali: But I can spell crayon!

Reno: _gasps _ How dare you!

Kali: _laughs_ BRING IT ON!!!

Reno: _charges Kali _FROZEN FOOD AISLE!

Kali: APPLE CIDER!!!

_Dust cloud appears. Fade to black. Stops suddenly in middle of fade_

Kali and Reno: _have stopped fighting _ Bye all! _Continue fighting. Fade to black again_

**The End!!!**


	12. Evil Hotel?

Hiya once again! Im on a role, posting chapters left and right! Yahoo! I hope you enjoy!

**Gundam Tales Chapter 11:**

**Evil Hotel?**

Reno: Welcome to G.T.!

Kali: _yawns_ The snoring the snoring!

Reno: This all started with a trip to Six Flags Over Texas…

Kali: May I point out before we start, that this story is based upon actual events, though some may be exaggerated or non existant!

Kali and Reno: And this is how it went…

_Scene fades to church parking lot_

Kali:_ jumps out of a car _Vacation time! Woohoo!

Reno: _gets out of another car, flashing walkie-talkies. Hands one to Kali _Okay! Lets get going, it is a six hour trip after all!

Kali: Yeah!

Heero: _gets out of Kali's car_ Lets go!

Reno: Alright! Dani, Rei, Duo, Trowa, and Sesshomaru, my car!

Sesshomaru: I want to ride with my sex slave…

Reno: _sweatdrop _ Fine… Wufei, looks like you're with us!

Wufei: Im driving.

Reno: _grumbles _ Fine…

Heero: _gets in other car, in drivers seat_

Kali: Alright! Sesshomaru, back seat, babe.

Rei: Kali! I want to ride with you!

Kali: Okay! Come on!

_Scene fades to black and reopens in the cars, on the way to Dallas_

Reno: _is singing Red Hot Love over the walkie talkie_

Kali: Dang Reno! That's gonna be tough to beat!

Heero: _rolls eyes_ Give me that! _Takes the walkie talkie from Kali_ You guys ready?

Reno: _in other car, sweatdrop_ Lets see what you got!

Heero: _begins singing_ Play that funky music white boy…

Kali: _laughs_

Reno: _pales _Man, that's so not cool…

Wufei: _driving Reno's car, laughing_ He's got you beaten!

_2 hours later_

All: …

Reno: Im hungry and have nothing to do…

Kali: Roger that rubber ducky

Reno: This isn't the song convoy.

Kali: OK… whatever.

Heero: My arms are cramping…

Wufei: I need a drink.

All: _see a guy holding a sign that says _ Why lie, I want a cold beer

Heero: That's odd…

Duo: Pull over at that restaurant!

Wufei and Heero: Ok

_In restaurant, which will remain anonymous_

Reno: Alright! Humperdinks!

Kali: _hits him_ You idiot! The name was supposed to remain anonymous!

Reno: Oops…

Heero: Yay! Its named after my idol off of the Princess Bride! Evil Prince Humperdink! But I wont tell anyone that…

All: _look at Heero, in the corner, mumbling_

Reno: Heero, maybe you should let Kali drive…_ back on the road with Wufei and… Sesshomaru driving_

Kali, Heero, and Rei: _screaming_

Kali: Pull over!

Sesshomaru: Why, we're there.

_All turn to see Homewood Suites in all its glowing glory, with the 'ahhhh' music going_

Kali: Thank God…

All: _go in, bet 2 rooms and move in. Kali, Heero, Sesshomaru, and Reno in one room, Wufei, Dani, Rei, Trowa, and Duo in the other._

Kali: _looks out window, does a double take, and screams_

Heero, Sesshomaru, and Rei: What!

Kali: _points, grinning_ It's a goldfish car! Ya know, kinda like the Oscar Mayer Weiner van? It's a goldfish with sunglasses!

Reno: COOOOOOOOL!

Kali: Lets go swimming!

Reno: Okay!

_10 minutes later_

Kali: _steps out into hallway with Reno close behind. Starts walking._ Wow… this is nice…

Reno: Yeah…

_1 hour later_

Kali:_ still walking. Stops suddenly. _ Reno, didn't we already pass this painting?!

Reno: _cries_ I don't know! Its all the same!

Kali and Reno: _cling to eachother and scream_

Heero: _peeks out of the door they are standing next to_ You guys back already? I was about to come and join you.

Kali: _jumps on Heero_ Thank God! We're found! (A/N: The hotel was really like that! Reno and I got lost a few times, and there were repeats of paintings everywhere, and it was scary! We dubbed it the Poltergeist Hotel!)

Heero: Okay… lets go swimming.

Kali and Reno: Okay!

_1 hour later_

Heero: Where are we?

Kali and Reno: _sweatdrop_

Kali: Not again!

Reno: _cries again_

Duo: _pops his head out of the door Kali, Reno, and Heero are standing by_ Hi guys! Whats up?

Kali: We're saved!!

Reno: _jumps on Duo_ Again!

Duo: _hits Reno _Get off! _Sticks his head back into the door_ Rei, are you ready?

Rei: Yeah!

Duo: We're going to the pool.

Reno: _screams_

Kali: _rolls eyes_ We've tried that twice already!

Duo: _raises eyebrow_ Follow me.

_5 minutes later, all are at the pool_

Reno: _in awe_ Duo! You're a god!

Duo: Uh, yeah, the God of Death… duh…

Kali: The pool…

Reno: CANNONBALL!!! _Jumps in and hits the bottom_ OWWW!

Heero: Only 4 ½ feet deep! That's crappy…

Reno: _cries yet again_

Heero: _taps Kali's shoulder_ Hot tub…

Kali: _grins_ Heck yeah!

_Next day. In Kali's room, all are there ready for Six Flags_

Reno: _hands out walkie talkies on channel 4_ (A/N: If only we would have known the trouble this would cause in real life…)

Kali: I must know who is doing the A/N. Their voice is low, sexy, and somewhat freakish.

All:_ leave_

_1 hour later_

Heero: Where is the damned parking lot!

Wufei: Injustice.

Reno: The gate is right there. _Points across the road_

Heero and Wufei: _sweatdrop, and wreck the cars. 15 minutes later_

Reno: The first ride! The Texas Giant!

Wufei: _shakes a lil_

Dani: _nudges him_ Are ya afraid Wufei?

Wufei: Baka onna! Of course not! I'm a Gundam pilot!

Heero: Yeah! We're not scared!

Reno: Who said anything about you, Heero? You just told off on yourself!

Heero: No I was speaking for the Gundam pilots as a whole… yeah, that's right… as a whole.

Sesshomaru: Sure loser.

Reno: We need to shave Sesshomaru's tail!

Sesshomaru: WHAAAAAAAAAT!? _Glares at Reno_

Reno: What? You'll get hot. _Comes at Sesshomaru with clippers_

Mysteryman: Nooo!_ Protects Sesshomaru_

Reno: Baker!?

Baker: Yup, that's me! I gotta protect him! I need a plushie!

Kali: BAKER! _Hugs him_ I've missed you!

Reno: Lets ride!

All: Woohoo!

_On Texas Giant_

Kali: YEAH!!! _Laughing_

Reno: _funny look on face_

Heero: _clenched teeth and is white…_

Wufei: INJUSTICE! INJUSTICE!

Dani: HOLY SHIT!

Rei: WOOHOO!

Duo: HELL YEAH!

Trowa: …

_On ground_

Wufei: No more…

Dani: Are you scared?

Wufei: _gulps and glares_ FINE!

Trowa: …

Rei: Its alright Trowa.

Duo; _ grin plastered on his face_

Kali: Oh brother…

Reno; Time for Mr. Freeze!

Heero: _pales_

Kali: _whispers in his ear_

Heero: Okay, I'll do it…

Reno: Lets split up!

Kali: _nods_ I wanna ride Titan and Batman!

_They separate into groups. Reno, Heero, Kali, and Sesshomaru in one, Trowa, Wufei, Rei, Dani, and Duo in the other. 1 hour later_

Reno: _group in line for Batman_ Man, this is ridiculous. _Pulls out his walkie talkie_ Hello to all! Welcome to your afternoon show, for all you folks waiting in ridiculously long lines out there! _Pauses_ What should my name be?

Kali: Nico the Freako!

Reno: Yeah! This is Nico the Freako, your host for the evening. We are currently in line for Batman, waiting, waiting, in sector 3 of 10! Yikes! (A/N: Yes, Reno really did this!)

_Other group_

Duo: What the hell is he doing!

Rei, Trowa, and Dani: _shrug_

Wufei: Idiot…

_Back to Reno 30 minutes later_

Reno: We are now in sector 5 of 12, and if somebody doesn't answer, I am going to run off with a bunch of women and leave my children on your doorsteps!

Kali: Apparently Duo's walkie talkie isn't working.

Reno: Wow people! We have hit sector 6, we are running up stairs, more stairs and more stairs to sector 7…8…9… we reach the top, the beautiful top! _Gasp_ We find a dreadful thing… ANOTHER LINE! This is Nico the Freako signing off as we ride the Batman. _On ride_ AHHHH! HOLY SHIT! MY FEET NEARLY HIT THAT BUILDING!

Kali: _screaming, in a good way_

Heero: _teeth clenched, pale faced, covered in cold sweat, and is stiff_

Sesshomaru: ……

Dani: _screaming too_

Wufei: _almost crying_ No more injustice…

_On ground_

Kali: Wow!

Sesshomaru: …

Heero: _pale_ Fun…

Dani: _is kneeling next to Wufei, who is ba-ba-bubaba-ing _Its okay Wufei! We're on the ground now!

Reno; _on the walkie talkie_ Nico the Freako is back!

Person: _on walkie talkie_ Hello?

Reno: Hello! Who is this?!

Person: This is park security. And this is a secure channel, may I ask what you're doing on it? (A/N: This really happened too!)

Reno: _gulps and switches channels_ Oops…

_That night back at the hotel_

All: _asleep_

Bob: _whispering_ Bed arrangements are as follows

George: Although strange…

Bob: Kali and Heero, Duo and Rei, Wufei and Dani, Sesshomaru and noone, and the odd one is Trowa and Reno.

Trowa: _while stil asleep, gets up and walks off of the bed saying: _I don't wanna ride this ride!

Reno: _wakes up_ Trowa we aren't at Six Flags any more.

_30 minutes later_

Trowa: _still asleep, puts his hand over Reno's mouth _Shhh! Im trying to hear the safety instructions!

_Next day_

Kali: _standing there, hands on hips, tapping foot._ Now, HOW THE HELL ARE WE SUPPOSED TO GET HOME!?

Wufei and Heero: _gulp_

Kali: YOU TWO IDIOTS JUST HAD TO WRECK THE CARS AND NOT TELL US!!

Latin guy: _pulls up in a big van_ Need a ride?

All: YES!

Rei: Whats your name?

Guy: Nico.

Rei: _smacks him_ You pervert!

Reno: _ducks behind Kali_

The End!

_Enter Reno and Kali_

Kali: Nothing to say!

Reno: Except that this was based on a real life experience!

Reno and Kali: Bye!


	13. GT Meets American Idol

Hola once more! Like I said, I am on a role in posting chapters. We have up to chapter 15 written, and this chapter is about 9 pages, and the next three chapters are barely that all together! So those will come faster, since they are shorter! Enjoy! O, and I guess I better also include DISCLAIMERS! Hehe… I tend to forget to do those sort of things… well, neither Reno nor I own Gundam Wing, much to our chagrin, nor do we own American Idol! There! I did it, yay!

**Gundam Tales Chapter 12: **

**G.T. Meets American Idol!**

_Enter Reno and Kali_

Kali: Welcome back everyone!

Reno: _sniffle _Our loyal fans…

Kali: Our loyal 6 or 7 fans… _sniffle_

Kali and Reno: _grab eachother_ WE LOVE YOU!!!

Reno: _lets go of Kali, wiping his eyes _ That's why we are going to combine your two favorite shows!

Kali: _wiping her eyes too _Yup… We are hosting American Idol, G.T. style! Please welcome Simon, Paula, and Randy!

Idol judges: _come out looking dazed_

Paula: Where are we?

Simon: I don't know…

Randy: _spots Kali and Reno _It's the Gundam Tales cast!

Kali: _looks dumbfounded_ Wow…

Reno: You know us?! _Runs and hugs Randy_

Kali: Make that 7 or 8 fans!

Reno: _still hugging Randy_

Kali: Oh brother… Let the show begin!

_Scene fades to black, and reopens in American Idol setup. Simon, Paula, and Randy are in their respective seats._

Kali: Welcome American Idol judges!

Simon: _rolls eyes_

Paula: Thank you!

Randy: I LOVE YOU, GUNDAM TALES!

Kali:_ sweatdrop_ Aww… Well, we've asked you here to judge our own little Gundam Idol! Bob and George will take Ryan Seacrest's place, and the rest of us will perform! Let the contest begin!

_Scene fades to Bob and George interviewing contestants_

Bob: Wow, Rei, that's always nice to know…

Rei: No prob! _Skips off_

George: Well, the first contestant is ready to begin! That would be…

Bob: Dani!

_Inside tryout room_

Dani: Hi!

Paula: Hi!

Randy: Yo!

Simon: Guy or girl?

Dani: _flushes_ Girl…

Simon: You need to work on the image…

Dani: _flushes more_ O… okay…

Paula: Well, you're singing Amazing Grace, a classic.

Simon: Don't butcher it…

Dani: _gulps_ Okay…_ clears throat and begins_ AMAZING GRACE! _Stops_

Paula: … Well?

Dani: That's all I know.

Simon: Out.

Paula: Sorry, out.

Randy: I love G.T.,out.

Dani: _sniffles _ Okay…

Simon: NEXT!

Baker: _enters_

Paula: Welcome Baker!

Simon: You best be better than the last.

Baker: _makes peace sign_ OOOOOOOOOtay!

Randy: Lets go!

Baker: _sings_ Why cant we be friends, why cant we be friends… _dancing around, doing the Baker dance (A/N: there is no sufficient way to describe the Baker dance, but for lack of better description, it's a mixture of a booty dance and swinging hand motions!)_

Paula: Wow…

Randy: Awesome!

Simon: _laughing_

All: IN!

Baker: Yeah! _Leaves_

Paula: Next, please.

Brian: _enters_ How you doin?

Paula: _sweatdrop _Your singing… The McDonalds theme song?

Brian: _nods_ The normally unheard version… and truest one… and I can sing this cuz I work there!

Randy: _gasp_ No!

Brian: _nods_ Yes!_ Sings_ McDonald's is our kind of place! Hamburgers in your face, french-fries between your toes, dill pickles up your nose, and lets don't forget our delicious shakes, straight from polluted lakes! McDonalds is out kind of place!!!

Paula: _sweatdrop_

Randy: The sad thing is, its true.

Simon: Oh, brother.

All: Out!

Paula: _with a lil less energy_ Next…

Duo: _enters_

Paula and Simon: _stare_

Paula: Your hot!

Simon: Yeah, you fit the description per- No, you don't look the part at all!

Duo: Oh really.

Simon: Yes.

Randy: O your in for it now Simon.

Duo: _turns and opens curtains behind him, revealing thousands of screaming girls_

Judges: Just sing.

Duo: Say your prayers little one don't forget my son, to incl-

Simon: STOP! Just stop…

Paula: Mercy youre hot…

Randy: How long does it take you to wash your hair?

All: Out!

Simon: _growls_ If they're all like this, I'll die!

Randy: Next!

Lou: _comes in_ Hi!

Paula: Sing… please…

Lou: _clears throat_ Cry me a river… cry me a river! _In high pitched falsetto (A/N: Yes, Lou really can sing this song and sound just like Justin Timberlake… _shudders_)_

Simon: NOOOO!!!

Paula: _screams_

Randy: LEAVE!

Lou: FINE! _Leaves_

Rei: _enters_ Are you ready for me?

Paula: _nods_ Come on in sweetie.

Rei: _smiles_ Okay!

Simon: What a beautiful child.

Randy and Paula: _gasp_ What! _Feel Simon's forehead_ Are you okay?

Simon: Sing please.

Rei: _opens mouth and hits one not_

Simon: IN!

Paula and Randy: _pass out_

Rei: What about them?

Simon: They're indisposed at the moment… My vote is the only one that counts… IN!

Rei: _smiles_ Yay!

Simon: What a lovely girl…

Duo: _runs in_ DON'T YOU BE CRUSHIN ON MY REI YOU OLD…_ is taken away yelling and screaming_

Rei: Oh my… _follows_

_1 hour later, all judges are awake and accounted for, waiting for the next singer_

Randy: _gasp_ Its Reno! He's a genius. In writing at least.

Paula: Well lets hear him!

Reno: _enters, wearing weird glasses, with his eyes taped back_

Simon: Hong!

Paula and Randy: _sweatdrop_

Paula: Umm… you're singing She Bangs?

Simon: _as Reno nods, he screams_

Randy: Its okay! Lets hear this…

Reno: Aw righ! _ Clears throat_ She bangs, she bangs, ooo babee she moov she moov.

Simon: _falls out of chair with swirls in his eyes_

Paula: Oh my…

Randy and Paula: OUT!

_1 hour later yet again Simon has recovered_

Randy: Next is Mike…

Paula: Okay.

Mike: _enters_

Simon: You're singing… Im too sexy….

Mike: _nods_

Paula: Lets do this.

Mike: Okay! _Turns around and lights go out. A spotlight appears on Mike. He spins around in tight leather pants and a mesh shirt_ I'm too sexy for my shirt, too sexy for my shirt, so sexy yeah it hurts!_ Is stripping_

Paula: _drooling_

Simon: STOP!

Mike: _stops in midstrip_

All: IN!

Mike: _cheers and leaves_

Paula: Wow… the next Sex, I mean Gundam Idol.

Simon and Randy: _rolls eyes_

Simon: NEXT!

Wufei: _enters_

Paula: You're singing American Woman?

Wufei: _nods_

Randy: Begin.

Wufei: _bows respectfully. Busts out into song AMERICAN WOMAN! Stay away from mee! American woman! Mama let me bee!_

All: IN!

Paula: Next is Heero.

Heero: _enters_

Paula: Hi!

Heero: ……

All: _sweatdrop_

Paula: Okay, lets hear you sing.

Heero: _clears throat_ Um… can I have Kali present? I sing better when she's near.

Simon: What, are you gonna have her up your butt on tour? I don't think so.

Heero: _glares_ Omae o korosu.

All: _sweatdrop_

Paula: Sing please.

Heero: I like your pants around your feet. I like the dirt that's on your knees, I like the way you still say please, while youre loo-

Simon: STOP! YOU CALL THAT SINGING!?

Paula: Simon, I don't think you want to…

Simon: _still ranting on how bad it was_

Heero: _pulls out gun_ Omae o korosu! _ Shoots Simon in the shoulder_

Medics: _run in, put Simon on a stretcher, and run out_

Paula: To have medics on hand, this must happen quite often…

Kali: _peeks in_ You have no idea, especially when its to do with me or insulting his pride._ Glares at Heero _Heero! Look at what you've done! We needed Simon as a judge!

Heero:_ pouts_ But Kali! I warned them to let me have you near! You know I cant control myself without you!

Kali: _looks at judges_ Did he?

Randy and Paula: _nod_

Kali: _sighs_ Okay, you're off the hook. Hmm… replacement judge! RENO!

Reno: _appears acting like Simon_ Im redah!

Kali: NEXT!

Trowa: _enters_ Hi…

Paula: … You don't carry a gun do you?

Trowa: No…

Paula: _sighs in relief_ Okay.

Trowa: I carry a bazooka!

Paula: _sweatdrop_

Randy: Sing!

Trowa: _sings_ He's the lily of the valley…

Randy and Paula: Stop! IN!

Trowa: Yes!

Reno: What about my input?

Randy: Don't matter, majority rules!

Reno: _sniffle_ Next…

Meg: _enters_ Im just gonna sing_…sings_ Did you ever know that you're my heeero!

All: STOP!

Reno: YOU CALL THAT SINGING!?

Paula: Reno!

Reno; Sorry… I got carried away…

All: OUT!

Reno: Next!

Quatre: _enters_

Paula: He's so cute!!! _Pounces and hugs_ Such fluffy hair!

Reno: I thought you were in feudal era Japan?!

Quatre: I was finally brought back, time set device, remember?

Paula: _still cuddling Quatre_

Reno and Randy: _sweatdrop_

Reno: Cute?

Randy: Fluffy?

Paula: He has my vote!

Reno: Where are you Simon!?

_Flash to hospital, where Simon is seducing nurses_

Reno: Holy shiznit! Sing Quatre!

Quatre: Nobody knows what its like to be the bad man, to be the sad man, behind blue eyes.

Reno: Sorry buddy, but I got you beat!

Randy and Paula: What?

Reno: Just kidding!

All: In!

Reno: Next!

Kali: _enters_ Hi!

Reno: Sissy!

Paula: Sing.

Kali: _clears throat_ The first cut is the deepest…

Paula: Stop! That was horrid!

All: Out!

Kali: _sniffle_ Okay…

_Scene fades and reopens on Bob and George_

Bob: Well that's it for this chapter!

George: Stay tuned for chapter 13, the semi finals!

Bob: The semi finalists are… Rei, Trowa, Quatre, Mike, Baker, and Wufei!

G.T. Cast and Judges: Bye!

Reno: _back in W. Hong outfit_ Byee!

Simon: _passes out_

**The End!**


	14. Semi Finals!

Hello again! Well, here are the semi finals! I hope that you will enjoy! And I don't own Gundam Wing or American Idol, the latter I could do without, but Rei is obsessed with it, so I did it for her! Enjoy!

**Gundam Tales Chapter 13:**

**Semi Finals!**

_Enter Reno and Kali_

Reno: Hey! Welcome back!

Kali: I hope you enjoyed last chapter, and I hope we haven't left you hangin to badly…

Reno: _cough_ Not… _cough_

Kali: _slaps Reno _ Shut up! Now for the semi finals!

_Scene fades_

Randy: No, not again!

Paula: _Looks at Randy_ What?

Randy: We're back in G.T. land…

Paula and Randy: _faint_

Reno: Welcome back to Gundam Idol!

Randy: Semi finalists are: Rei, Trowa, Quatre, The oh so sexy Mike…

Paula: The woman hater Wufei…

Reno: And the other ¼ of me, the lovable, sexy and now available in a plushie… BAKER!

Crowd: _cheers_

Rei: _enter_ Hello again.

Reno, Randy, and Paula: Hiya!

Rei: Sweet.

Reno: _cough_

Rei: Home

Reno: _cough_

Rei: _teary eyed_ Alaba-

Reno: _cough_

Rei: _cries and runs away_

Randy: Reno?

Paula: You jerk.

Reno: _is choking on a sub sandwich_

Justin Elkins: Hey, that's my song!

Kali: _glares at Reno_ You will die a horrible, imaginative, only-one-a-fan-fic-writer-could-come-up-with death!

Heero: _throws Kali over his shoulder_ But only after I'm done with her. _Runs off with Kali_

Paula: O my… Next!

Trowa: _enters_

Randy: Joy!

Simon: _still grumbling about Rei being kicked off_

Paula: Lets hear this.

Trowa: Hi ho, hi ho, its off to work we go… _whistles_

Paula: YES!

Randy: Dwarfs!

All: In!

Randy: Next!

Quatre: _enters. Is wearing gothic clothes with various piercings._

Paula: Nooo! My cute puppy!

Quatre: _hard rock music is heard_ Get up, come on get down with the sickness…

Paula and Randy: Nooo!!! Stop it!

Reno: _attempting to head the board of judges_ IN!!!

Paula and Randy: _jump Reno_

Reno: Out!

Paula: _crying_

Simon: Next!

Mike: _enters with a load of chicks in bikinis and wearing baggy jeans, a big shirt, and a huge diamond dollar sign around his neck_

Simon and Randy: _jaws drop_

Mike: _sings_ Pretty Fly for a White Guy! _Chicks dancing around_

Simon and Randy: _pass out_

Paula: Out!

All: Next!

Baker: _enters wearing an Oscar Mayer Wiener shirt_

Paula: Yay!

Baker: _sings_ OOOO! I wish I were an Oscar Mayer Wiener! That's what I'd really like to be, for if I were an Oscar Mayer Wiener, Everybody'd be in love with me!!!

Baker Fanclub: _groups of singing, shouting, sign-holding, and dancing girls_ WE LOVE YOU BAKER!!

All: IN!

Randy: Next!

Paula: Its Wufei.

Wufei: _enters_

Paula: He is singing… Bi…t…ch _fumes like only an anime person can do_

Wufei: Baka Onna…

Paula: Hell no! _jumps the judges table and starts a fight with Wufei_

Reno, Randy, and Simon: _sweatdrop_

Reno: Out!

Randy: Out!

Simon: I will never make fun of Paula again…

_Scene fades_

Reno: Ouch…

Kali: Yeah.

Reno: Next time.

Kali: Chapter 14.

Reno and Kali: The finals!

Reno: And the duet… _grins wickedly_

Reno and Kali: Bye!

_Scene fades to black_

Kali: Reno, did you forget to pay the light bill…

Reno: _gulps_

Kali: RENOOOO!!!!!!!


	15. Finals!

Hi once more! K, I don't own Gundam Wing or American Idol, unfortunately…but, Reno and I do own our characters… obviously! Im on a role! Hehe, more postings! Sorry…I am crazy after all…

**Gundam Tales Chapter 14:**

**Finals!**

_Enter Reno and Kali_

Reno: _covered in bruises_ Hiya!

Kali: Due to the fact Reno didn't pay the light bill, the G.T. set has no power.

Reno: So after a great beating, we decided to hold the Finals in Cranfords Grocery Store!

Kali: The biggest store in White Hall!

Reno: And they even own a funeral home…

Kali: Makes ya think twice about wanting to shop for groceries there…

Reno: Kali, we aren't in Texas! ( A/N: I don't even know what Reno meant by this comment… I am truly stumped…)

_Scene fades_

Bob: Welcome to Gundam Idol Finals!

George: It's a bit crowded in here…

Bob: Yes, all 13 people make this crowd huge!

George: The store is busting at the seams!

Bob: Today's finalists are Trowa and Baker.

George: And now for their duet!

Baker and Trowa: What?!

Reno: Apparently you have to sing a duet.

Kali: Randomly selected…

Bob and George: And the song is…. A Whole New World!

Trowa: _faints_

Baker: _cheers_ I love that song! And the movie!

Crickets: _cricket cricket_

Baker: Trowa?

Trowa: _swirly eyed_

Kali: I gotta see this!

_Scene fades and reopens to Trowa and Baker in suits, on the deli counter of Cranfords. The music starts_

Trowa: I can show you the world, Shinning, shimmering, splendid, Tell me princess now when did you last let your heart decide. I can open your eyes, take you wonder by wonder, over, sideways, and under on a magic carpet ride.

_Chourus_

Baker: _dancing around_ A whole new world! A dozen donuts taste like I never knew, But when the filling is gone, I feel so empty, now that my donuts are gone…

_Next verse_

Baker: Unbelievable sights, indescribable music, since Randy paula you make this sow an endless diamond sky! A whole new world!

Trowa and Baker: _freestyle due to forgotten words_ A whole new thong!

Paula, Randy, Simon and Kali: _pales_

Baker: Indescribable feeling.

Heero: _passes out, swirly eyed on floor_

Trowa: It makes you sing, A whole new thong…

Trowa and Baker: _bust out into You Are My Sunshine._

_Lights go out_

Paula, Randy and Simon: _dumbfounded_

Paula: Lets hear Trowa.

Trowa: _comes out on deli counter wearing one of those dredlock wigs with the big, fluffy, colorful hat, and carrying tomtoms._

Simon: Well?

Trowa: _clears throat_ Don't worry… _beats on the tomtoms _ Be happy… Come on, mon…

All: _sweatdrop_

Kali: YEAH! GO TROWA!

Simon: Now for Baker…

Baker: _comes out with a pretty blue ribbon in his hair, and ribbony clothes_

Paula: How cute!

Baker fanclub: WE LOVE YOU BAKER!

Baker: _clears throat _Cinderelli Cinderelli, night and day _is doing the infamous Baker dance_ Cinderelli, do the dishes do t he laundry, they always keep her hoppin! _Bows_

All: _cheer_

Judges: Baker wins!

All: Yeah!

Brian: _runs out and whacks Baker over the head_ Hehe… _sings_ Rubber duckie, you're the one! You make bathtime lots of fun!

_Security appears and begins chasing Brian around the store, who is still singing. Baker is swirly eyed on the deli counter, and the scene fades_

Kali: Its over…

Reno: Yay!

Kali: Well, Reno, for once your idea worked.

Reno: Yup, I make a motion that we officially add Baker, Brian and Mike to the G.T. cast, they all have been in more than three chapters.

Kali: Second!

Reno: Its official.

Kali: Well… The End!

_Scene fades_


	16. Damn American Licenses

Hello once more. We don't own Gundam Wing or its characters, so there ya have it. Forgive me, I'm not in the best of moods right now, sooooooo, if I seem biy, forgive me.

**Gundam Tales Chapter 15:**

**Damn American Licenses**

_Enter Reno and Kali_

Kali: Hola! Welcome to Damn American licenses!

Reno: The title explains it all!

Kali: Yeah, if we said anything more the chapter would be ruined.

Reno: Just to point out for ya all who haven't noticed, I'm a tad bit accident-prone.

Kali: With that said, you have been warned.

_Scene fades_

Reno: Kali!

Kali: What?

Reno: We let our licenses expire when we went to boot camp! They've been revoked!

Kali and Reno: _cry_

Kali: I cant believe this! All of us?

All: _nod_

_Scene fades and reopens with all the cast at the Driving Test Center_

Kali: _yawns_ Its too early for this…

Reno: _snore_

Wufei: Injustice.

Dani: _hits Wufei_ Shut up…

Heero: _walks in_ I failed…

Duo: _laughs_

Heero: _pulls out gun _ Omae o korosu.

Duo: _gulps_

Suki: We've all failed!

All: _tear_

Police Woman:_ enters_ I cant believe any of you even had a license! This is ridiculous! You're all assigned to Driver's Ed!

All:_ gasp_

_Scene fades and reopens at Drivers ed center_

Reno: _gasp_ OMG!!! I just realized we get to get down and crazy in golf carts!

Person: _enters_ Wel…come…

Reno: NOIN! _Pounces_

Noin: NOOOO!!! _Screams_

Zechs: _runs out of his office_ What is it… _pales and falls to his knees_ Why me!!! _Still on knees, raises his hands to the sky_ Why must you torture us this way!? They had driver's licenses! What happened!

Kali: Hi Zechs.

Zechs: _cries_

Heero: _pats Zechs shoulder_ It will be alright…

_Scene fades, Zechs still crying. Reopens on G.T. cast in a classroom, Zechs teaching_

Zechs: Now, when you come to a four way stop, the first person there has the right of way. But, if you get there at the same time…

Reno: Wait! You lost me on the turning signals… you use the right blinker when?

Zechs: _places head in hands_ Reno, we covered that 2 hours ago.

Reno: _is staring at Suki Yumi_ Huh? Did you say something?

Zechs: Forget it… Lets practice driving.

Duo: You are truly hopeless man.

Reno: **…..**

Baker: Come on! You're giving her the ' you are a cheeseburger' look!

Reno: That reminds me, I'm hungry!

Brian: _jumps on Reno_ I have a biscuit!

Baker and Reno: NOOO! That thing is 2 years old!

Zechs: _turns green_ God help me I need a vacation.

All: Just don't go to Six Flags…

Kali: Brian it will be alright! _Hugs him_

Brian: _pouts_ But Tori-burger! He refused the biscuit!

Baker: _sniffle_ NOT! Get over it!

_All are outside._

Zechs: _demonstrates the course._ Now you try it Reno.

Reno: _still staring at Suki_ Huh?

Suki: _hits Reno _ Reno! You're up!

Reno: I am? _Looks down_ Oh! I'm up! Sorry…

Kali: You truly are hopeless…

Heero: _snickering_

Reno: _gets into cart with Zechs_ Here we go! _Starts cart and takes off, running over various signs and cones_

Zechs: _holding on for his life_ AIIEEEEE!!! Your're on the wrong side of the road!

Reno: _staring at Suki_ Huh? This isn't a road, it's a line of cones… _crashes_

Suki: Oi veh…

Reno: _swirly eyed_

Zechs: Ow…

Trowa: That's embarrassing.

Heero: _taps him on the shoulder_ You and Baker sang a duet with a the words 'a whole new thong' in it…

Duo: Now that's embarrassing.

Zechs: Reno, how in the hell did you get your license in the first place!?

Reno: It only took me two times and I passed with a 98%.

Zechs: _pales_ Well Heero, your next. _Thinking_ _atleast heres a good driver._

Heero: _gets in and starts the cart. Knocks over more cones and signs than Reno, tehn nearly runs over his fellow students_

Zechs: _hairs sticking up all over his head_ And WHERE did you learn to drive like THAT!!??

Heero: War…

Zechs: Oi… NEXT!!!

_All take their turns, though no one is as bad as Heero._

Zechs: Ok! Time for testing! In an actual car!

All: Yay!

Zechs: Kali! _2 tests later_ Kali I know you can drive better than this… _on the 4th time_ That's it! You have it! God…

Kali: Yay!

Zechs: Oi…Heero!

Heero: _walks over to car, gets in, starts it, and takes off, leaving Zechs in the dust_

Zechs: _spitting out dirt_ Heero!

Heero: _backs up car, running over Zechs toes_

Zechs: OOO! _Jumping up and down, holding his foot_

_8 tests later_

Zechs: Damn it Heero! Here's your license! _His toes, fingers, and head are covered in bandages_ Reno, you're up!

Reno: _staring at Suki_

Suki: Reno!

Reno: Huh? _Looks around_ Okay! _Gets in car_

Zechs: _opens door and gets in. Is about to shut the door._

Reno: _backs car up, knocking the door off_

Zechs: _pales_ Oh no…

Reno: _singing_ Oh my Suki, my lovely Suki, I wish that you were mine! _Is doing donuts, taking turns on 2 wheels, etc._

Suki: _blushing_

Reno; _still in car, singing_ Suki, my beautiful Suki, WILL-YOU-MARRY MEEEEE!!! _Turning more donuts_

Zechs: Aieee!!! _Clutching onto things, trying not to be thrown from the car._

Suki: YES RENO!!!

Reno: Yeah! _Hits brakes_

Zechs: _in the windshield_ THAT'S IT!! YOU ALL HAVE YOUR LICENSES! NOW GET OUT!

All: _cheer_

Reno: YEAH! DOUBLE YEAH! _Hits the gas and spins car around, throwing Zechs from the car, then running over him_ Uh oh…

_At the hospital_

Zechs: _in body cast, leg and arm propped up_ I WILL KILL THEM ALL!!! _Laughs maniacally_

Noin: _sighs_ Zechs, I'm by your side…__

_Fade to black_

The End!

Kali: Muahahahahaha!!!

Reno: _ sings_ Bring me two pina caladas!

Kali: _smacks him_ Shut up!

Reno and Kali: Bye!!!

Kali: P.S. I cant believe Reno's getting married!!


	17. Vegas Wedding

**Gundam Tales Chapter 16:**

**Vegas Wedding**

_Enter Reno and Kali_

Kali: Welcome all!

Reno: _in a tux with tails and ruffles_ Yeah, welcome! I'm getting married today!

Kali: _ gasps and glares at Reno _ You'll ruin you tux! Take it off!

Reno: Huh? _It begins to rain_ Uh oh…

Kali: RENO!!!

Reno: _runs_

Kali: _ chases him_ I'll kill you! You ruined your tux!

Reno: _while running_ I'M SORRY! _To readers_ Enjoy my wedding!

_Scene fades_

PA System: Welcome to G.T. International Airport.

Reno and Kali: We have an airport?

G.T. Businessman: Yes, we found it to increase your profits by 120%, and plushie sales by 900%.

Reno: Everybody loves us!

G.T. Businessman: Actually, the Baker plushies have 100x the profit of any other plushie.

Baker: YAY!

Businessman: But Reno and Kali get all of the money.

Baker: WHAT!

Heero: Why are we at an airport?

Kali: Cuz we're going to Las Vegas.

Duo: By the way, who is your best man, Reno?

Reno: Why of course, its….

All guys: _glare at Reno_

Reno: _whimpers_ I haven't decided yet…

Kali: _rolls eyes_

P.A. System: Now boarding, Flight to Vegas! Yeah baby! _Coughs and clears throat_ Um, I repeat, Flight to Vegas is now boarding.

Cast: _board plane and arrive in Vegas 5 minutes later_

Reno: That was fast…

Kali: _hair sticking up_ We were going Mach 5.

Reno: Oh…

_At hotel_

Reno: I wont go!

All: _trying to get Reno into the hotel_

Reno: They are EVIL! They scare me!

Kali: Come on Reno, that was in Texas, this is Nevada.

Reno: _whimpers_

Duo: If you let me be your best man, I will get you bimbos.

Trowa: He'll be married moron, I will throw a karaoke party!

Heero: **…** I'll kill you if I'm not…

Reno: He has a validated point… but give me more time.

Brian: Lets go to McDonalds.

Baker: _turns green_ You wouldn't say that if you worked there…

Brian: I do work there idiot.

Baker: Oh yeah!

Suki: When is the Wedding?

Kali: Tonight.

All: What!?

Kali: Don't worry! Bob and George have made the arrangements.

All: Whew…

Suki: Where are they anyway?

Bob and George: _run up to them_ We're here!

Bob: All the arrangements are set!

George: Yup! Here's the address, the clothes are there!

Suki: _gazing at Bob in awe_ Hi Bob…

Bob: _grins_ Hi!

Kali: _snaps fingers in front of Suki_ Uh oh…

Heero: What time?

George: In one hour!

All: WHAT!!!

George: _realizes the problem_ Uh oh…

All: _run to chapel_

_At the chapel_

Suki: Elvis' Chapel of Unusual Weddings? (A/N: This is our chapel! We made it up! Woohoo!)

Reno: COOL!

Duo: _nudges Reno_ Who's your best man?

Reno: _gulps and ducks inside_

Suki: Kali, be my maid of honor!

Kali: Okay!

_All inside_

Bob and George: _come out of the back with outfits in hand. Hands one to Reno and one to Suki_ Here are the outfits!

Suki: **…** A kiwi suit… _looks at Reno who is in awe of his strawberry suit_

George: Yeah! You're getting married as fruit! Ya know, Strawberry_ motions to Reno_ Kiwi… _motions to Suki_

Kali: _sweat drop_

Bob: It could have been strawberry banana.

Suki: I think I'll stick to the kiwi…

Bob: Now time to go your separate ways to get ready! Girls go one way, the guys the other!

_In guys dressing room_

Heero: _points a gun at Reno_ Who's it going to be?

Reno: _gulps_ Not Duo.

Duo: Why? We're like bros man!

Reno: I don't want you checking out my wife! And not Trowa, cuz he cant sing.

Trowa: WTF! I was runner up in G.T. Idol!

Baker: Its me… or no more hamburgers.

Reno: _looks at Heero and then at Baker, then to Heero, etc._

Heero and Baker: Choose me!

Brian: _walks by, eating French fries._

Reno: BRIAN! Hes my best man!

All: _glare at Brian_

Heero: You will pay…

_20 minutes later. Kali and Brian are in their places, and the Veggie Tales Theme song plays._

Reno: Hey! We aren't veggies! We're fruity!

Duo: Duh, of course you're fruity Reno.

Kali: _rolls eyes_

_Waiting, waiting, and, what do ya know, more waiting. George walks in, looking preoccupied._

Reno: Where's my bride?

Kali: _eyes narrow_ Where's Bob…

George: Uh… hehehe…. Umm… well, they _are_ together…

Reno: But where…

George: On their honeymoon…

All: WHAT!?

Reno: Oh well. _Strips out of strawberry suit, revealing regular clothing_

Brian: Poor Reno.

Duo: We can still have the reception, right!?

Reno: Yeah! PARTY!!!

_1 hour later. All are partying hard, Duo is dancing with 3 bimbos from another wedding, who just so happen to be triplets. Rei and Trowa are in the girl's bathroom… Wufei and Dani are doing karaoke on stage, Reno is dancing with some chics from the triplets wedding party, Baker is eating (duh) and Kali and Brian are nowhere to be found… (uhoh)_

Heero: _talking to George_ Have you seen Kali?

George: Nope…

Heero; _glares_ You're an all knowing commentator! How can you not know!?

George: _gulps_

Heero: You know don't you…

George: _squeaks_ No…

_Heero advances on George as the scene fades. Scene reopens on Heero walking into the hallway to see Brian pinning Kali against a wall, doin only God knows what_

Heero: _sees red and pulls out his gun_ Omae o korosu

Kali: _gasps_ Heero, no!

Brian: Uh oh…

_Scene fades. Enter Kali and Reno_

Kali: Sorry to just leave ya there! But I'm sure you know what happened next…

Reno: Poor Brian… What were you two doing anyway.

Kali: _flushes_ Actually, we were just discussing the possibility of… _mumbles the rest_

Reno: _heard Kali and gasps_ WHAT! A THREESOME! My oh my…

Heero: Kali is mine. _Grabs Kali and runs off_

Reno: That was unexpected… _shrugs_ Well, join us next time! We're going to visit Brian in the hospital!

The End

Hola! Well, there is that chapter. Yes, Suki, we married you off to Bob… hehehe… Join us next time when we visit Brian in the hospital! Yay!


	18. Hospital Laser Tag!

Hey guys! Long time no see! Well, here is the latest chapter I've typed. Standard Disclaimers, and about the comment about Heavyarms, I DIDN'T MEAN IT, I SWEAR! TROWA IS MY SECOND FAV!

**Gundam Tales Chapter 17:**

**Hospital Under Siege! Part 1**

Enter Reno and Kali 

**Kali: Welcome! How are yall doing today?**

**Reno: I wonder what our fan base is now?**

**Kali: _whacks Reno_ You Shut UP!**

**Reno: HEY! I don't need to be in the hospital!**

**Kali: Poor Brian…**

**Reno: Here's da recap!**

**Bob: Well Kali and Brian were talking about…_gulps_**

**Heero: _glaring at Bob_**

**Bob: Um… about something… Heero wouldn't approve.**

**Heero: _gives Bob thumbs up_**

**Bob: _smiles_ And Heero shot Brian.**

**Reno: Soooo we are going to the hospital!**

Scene fades 

**Kali: Wait!_ Scene stops fading_ Bob's back!**

**Reno: How was the honeymoon?**

**Bob: Wonderful… Suki is at our new home with a white picket fence and a cute lil doggie!**

**Kali: Oh brother…**

Scene fades again. Reopens inside hospital room. Kali is sitting on Brian's bed, with Heero glowering close behind. Reno is staring out the window and Baker is eating Brian's hospital food

**Brian: You brought_ gulps_ him?**

**Heero: _glares_**

**Kali: _sighs, turns and glares at Heero, and whispers something. She turns back around. _Yup!**

**Heero: _Now isn't glaring(wow)_ Yeah, nice to know I didn't kill you.**

**Kali: _elbows his thigh_**

**Heero: _clears his throat_ Sorry…**

**Reno: PARTY!**

**All: Huh?**

**Reno: Simple- hide until after visiting hours, sleep during the day, and party all night.**

**Kali: Yeah, tag, skateboards, rollerblades, cart races… Hell, there are a bunch of things we could do!**

**Heero: _smirks_ Sounds like fun.**

**Reno: Baker! While everybody else is resting… _he whispers something to Baker_**

**Baker: Let Operation Get-Food-and-Secure-a-Place-to-Sleep-and-Hide-Ammunition Begin!**

**Kali:_ sweatdrop_**

**Heero: Reno and his operations.**

**Brian: Hey Reno.**

**Reno: Yeah**

**Brian: Combat bouncy biscuit-hospital version!**

**Reno: Hey! I'm a genius! We could play Combat bouncy biscuit-hospital version!**

**Brian: Wow, man, you are a genius!**

**Kali: By the way, has anyone seen Duo?**

**All: _various shaking of heads, nos, etc._**

**Reno: Hmmm…**

All hear muffled laughter 

**Brian: WTF?**

**Kali: Be right back. _Leaves room. 5 minutes later, comes back, extremely pale._**

**Brian: What's wrong?**

**Heero: _glares at Brian_ What is it?**

**Kali: _sighs_ He'll never change… Duo is in the room next to us…_ hear more muffled laughter_ …With two scantily clad nurses…**

**Reno: Go Duo!**

**Baker: All right!**

**Brian: _laughing_**

**Heero: _rolls eyes_**

**Kali: You stupid males! Anywho, I found our hiding place!**

**Baker and Reno: WHERE?**

**Kali: _Motions for them to come closer _Janitor's closet, down the hall. Its big enough for Heero and me!**

**Reno: What about us?**

**Kali: Oh yeah… _looks thoughtful_ Hey! This is a 20 floor hospital with a flat roof!**

**Baker: So?**

**Kali: Flat roof…**

**All: OHHH!**

**Kali: We'll come check on you once in a while, Brian! After or during some fun.**

**All: _leave_**

**Brian: Uh oh…**

Later, after visiting hours 

**Reno: Kali, flip 6-90 and take Trowa out! _In combat uniform with gear_**

**Kali: Huh? _Is in combat uniform too_**

**Reno: Just get him!**

**Kali: Gotcha! _Slips around corner and runs down the hall ducking into doorways. Spots Trowa._ DIE HEAVYARMS SCUM!(A/N: SHE DIDN'T MEAN IT, I SWEAR!) _Takes Trowa out._**

**Reno: _shows up behind her_ Alright, lets check on Brian, and then head back to base.**

**Kali: Right.**

In Brian's room 

**Kali: Hey! How ya feeling?**

**Brian: _staring_ I never knew you looked so good in camo!**

**Kali: Shut up!**

**Brian: By the way, why are you in camo? _Eyes the huge gun_ And luggin that thing around?**

**Kali: Laser tag. Well, we're gone! Bye!**

At red team base, in an open waiting room.

**Reno: _is leaning over battle plans_ Now we need… **

_**Outside base, duo is seen sneaking around wearing his signature maniac grin. He runs, he jumps, he lands on a food cart, gliding in front of the waiting room, shooting all he surveys**_

**Reno: HIT THE DECK!**

Duo disappears around the corner. Hear crashing. All run to see. Duo has crashed into the janitors closet and all are laughing. (Duos team won, btw)

Suddenly, the lights go out.

**Reno: WTF!**

Hear a voice over the intercom system 

**Voice: We are terrorists! We have taken over the hospital! G.T. cast come out with your hands up!**

**Kali: Lou?**

**Reno: Oi! _Cowers_**

**Heero: Baka**

**Baker: No! Lou + Brian Trouble!**

**Reno: Holy shiznit!**

**Kali: You ain't kiddin.**

**Reno: We will fight!**

**Kali: Yes.**

**Reno: Baker! Ammunition, the good stuff!**

**Baker: Sir!**

**Reno: Heero set up base with strategic defense and escape points.**

**Heero: … k.**

**Reno: Trowa! Guard duty for Brian, Duo, you're home base guard duty.**

**Duo: Sir!**

**Trowa:…….**

**Reno: Bob, George, a cliffhanger!**

**Bob and George: Sir!**

**The End… or is it?**

**Bob: Well guys, you heard Reno!**

**George: Yup! So, stay tuned for the next chapter!**

**Bob and George: Bye!**


	19. Terrible Terrorizing Terrorists

Okay, I know this chapter is really short, but this is only the continuation of Chapter 17! Sorry! Anywho, standard disclaimers, ya know the deal... blah... So, here we go!

**Gundam Tales Chapter 18:**

**Terrible Terrorizing Terrorists and Taco Bombs to Boot!**

Enter Kali and Reno 

Reno: Welcome Back!

Kali: _in camo with leaves hanging off of it_ It's a jungle out there…

Reno: It seems that Lou has taken over the hospital.

Kali: Why… we aren't sure.

Reno: But its going to be war.

Kali: The diplomatic tension started way back in Chapter 3.

Reno: And now we have cut off diplomatic relations and moved to dethcon 4.

Kali: Lou, you made a mistake attacking G.T.!

Reno: But its better than letting us attack you.

Kali: Yeah, if we attacked them we would already have weapons.

Reno: Now that he attacked us, it takes us .032579 seconds to get fully armed.

Kali: Sooo, we start.

Scene fades to camo, and then reopens in Nurses station. All are there but Baker and Trowa.

Reno: _is bent over battle plans_ K, Heero, where would Lou set up his base?

Heero: Well, strategically, this is the best place… _points on map where really good base is._ But Lou is Lou, he'd set base up here. _Points to an open waiting room with several entrances_

Reno: Right… We'll move in on all sides and take 'em down. Baker… Where is Baker? We need ammo!

Baker: _returns_ There is nothing! We have to fake it with laser guns!

Heero: They'd fall for it too…

Kali: Lets move!

All slipping around the perimeter Lou has set up. Heero holds his fist up Predator style, and then shouts CHARGE! All of Lou's supporters drop their weapons and give up. Lou grabs Kali and runs.

Flash to Brian and Trowa.

Brian: _holds up a burrito from Taco Bell_. See this Trowa?

Trowa: _nods_

Brian: This is a taco bomb. A three month old burrito from where I work. They're deadly!

Trowa: _laughs_

Flash back to Lou, who is sliding around corners, Kali in his grasp, singing his own theme music. Finally, he ducks into a room.

Lou: Finally…_ has a gun to Kali's head_

Brian: WTF!

Lou: Oh great!

Brian: What the hell is your problem?

Lou: I HATE YOU! YOU TOOK MY PLACE AS BUBBIE AND I WAS KICKED OFF THE SHOW!

Kali: _chuckles and rubs her fingers together. (ya know, worlds smallest violin playin a sad sad song for ya)_

Sudden slow motion. Lou is about to shoot Kali, and he is laughing maniacally. Brian jumps out of the bed, ripping the end off of the burrito, then shoves it into Lou's mouth. Then he grabs Kali and dives under the bed with Trowa. Lou gags, and turns green. And then his head explodes, and taco salad goes everywhere.

Brian: That was close… 

Kali: Yeah…

Fade to terrorist base all terrorists are tied up and G.T. cast is standing guard

Heero: Where's Reno?

Reno: _Suddenly drops from ceiling Mission Impossible style_

Hey, What happened? What'd I miss? 

All: _sweatdrop_

Brian: _walking around_

Reno: Brian, I thought you were hurt…

Brian: Nope, Just all apart of me and Heero's plan to play at the hospital.

Heero: BAKA! You weren't supposed to tell! _Shoots Brian_

Scene fades 

**The End!**


	20. No MoneyNo Job Carnival is in Town

Okay, so it's been awhile! I've been busy with college and all, so yeah. Here is our chapter 19, standard disclaimers apply and such… so yeah…

Chapter 19

No Money+ No Job Carnival is in Town!

_Scene opens_

Kali: Welcome!

Reno: Do you ever get tired of saying that?

Kali: Nope.

Reno: That's good.

Kali: _whacks Reno_ What's that supposed to mean?

Reno: _mumbles under breath_ One day I'm gonna sue.

Kali: WHAT? _ Chases Reno with a mallet_

Reno: _stops running_ Sorry, but the title explains all.

Kali: RENO!

_Scene fades and hear a loud thump. Scene reopens to desert._

Kali: Water! _Is dragging herself across the sand_

Reno: Need water…

Duo: _raises eyebrow_ We're not that poor.

Reno: Oh yeah!

_Scene reopens to our house_

Duo: But we are being evicted.

Kali: Point, we are in a hotel… (refer to chapter 1)

Reno: We are being chased by the FBI, CIA, NSA, IRS, and G.T. Police.

All: WHAT!

Reno: Yeah, for fraud.

Kali: Why?

Reno: That ticket you won? It was fake, I made it out of a cereal box top.

Kali: Reno!

_Scene fades to blank screen. Hear violent noises and curse words. Scene reopens._

Kali: _panting_ You idiot!

Reno: _is unconscious on the floor and covered in bruises, has bumps upon bumps, upon bumps, and is swirly eyed._

Duo: What are we gonna do?

Kali: _thinking_ Hmm….

Heero: We could just get jobs and pay off this place for life.

Kali: Yeah, but where on earth could we find people that would be crazy enough to hire us?

Dani: The carnival is in town…

Wufei: I WILL NOT WORK IN A CARNIVAL!

_Scene fades and reopens on Wufei selling hotdogs at a hot dog stand._

Wufei: _ mumbling under his breath_

Dani: What was that, Wufei?_ Glares_

Wufei: NOTHING!

Reno: _walks by_ Yes I would like a hotdog.

Wufei: What? Why aren't you working?

Reno: I am, why aren't you? Where's my hotdog?

Wufei: Where are you working?

Reno: _flashes badge_ I'm a rent-a-cop.

Cop: Hey you.

Reno: Yes?

Cop: We need you for Dunk-a-Cop.

Reno: _being drug away_ NOOOOOO!

Little boy: _crying_

Mom: What's wrong dear?

Boy: That clown was mean.

Mom: Which one honey?

Boy: The one in spandex with a gun who says oh my a chorus too.

Dani: Oh no….

Wufei: Would you like a hotdog?

Kali: Wufei! Its me!

Wufei: _jaw drops_ Kali!

Kali: _is wearing a slinky outfit and is carrying knives_ Yup! I get to throw knives at Trowa!

Trowa: She's not that bad.

Dani: Kali, you have to talk to Heero, he's scaring little children.

Kali: No prob! I'll just tell him no more sex unless he's nice. _Goes and talks to Heero_

Heero: WHHAAAAT?

Guy: No! Not that voice! The G.T. Cast….

Girl: Relax Zechs, they won't bother us here.

Zechs: You're right, Noin.

Reno: _still being drug away by a cop_ Hi Zechs, Noin!

Zechs and Noin: _pale and scream loudly_ AIEEEEEE!

Zechs: _falls to knees_ No! Why torture me, God? What have I done to deserve this?

Noin: _looks thoughtful_ Well, you did kill hundreds of people in a war, and left hundreds more without family.

Zechs: _sweatdrop_

Kali: Zechs! _ Tackles him_ My squishy…

Zechs: _ gulps and glances at Heero, who is giving him the _

_Death Glare™_

Noin: Just out of curiosity, where is Reno going?

Kali: Dunk-a-Cop.

Zechs: Muahahhahaha! Revenge shall be mine!

Duo: Good luck, it's like a five hour wait.

Kali: A lot of people don't like him..

Zechs: I don't care, I will dunk him!

_7 hours later_

Zechs: _throws ball and misses_ DAMN!

Reno: Haha!

Zechs: _throws second ball and misses_ Argh!

Reno: YOU SUCK!

Zechs: _throws third ball and misses. Pitches a fit, cursing, stomping foot, etc._

Reno: _laughing_

Wufei: _finds a weirdly shaped weenie and tosses it over his shoulder, where it hits the circle and Reno gets dunked. Wufei pushes his cart away._

Reno: _gurgle gurgle_

Zechs: NOOO! Vengeance wasn't mine! _Cries_

Noin: The carnival is gone, we are leaving.

Reno: _gets out of booth_ The good news is I have so many people who hate or are obsessed with me that I made over $13,000,000,000,000.02.

Zechs: _swirly eyed_

Noin: _twin waterfalls_

Kali: The .02 was from me!

Dani: Now we can buy our floor of the hotel!

Kali and Dani: _hug with twin waterfalls_ We're saved!

The End

Kali: Yes, I know this chapter sucked.

Reno: But I was ready to get to the next chapter… Our next CROSSOVER!

Kali and Reno: YAY!


	21. Kenshin, Yu Yu Hakusho, and Reno's Jelly

**Gundam Tales Chapter 20**

**Kenshin, Yu Yu Hakusho, and Reno's Jelly**

Enter Reno and Kali.

Kali: Welcome back!

Reno: As you've read by the title, we are having yet another crossover.

Reno and Kali: Yay!

Kali: I think Kuabara and Yahiko will get along great… except for Kuabara calling him a squirt…

Reno: MUAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA! Return of the Time Travel Jellyton!

Kali: You are NOT using me as a guinea pig this time. _glares at Reno_ Use Quatre.

Reno: Ok!

Scene fades and reopens on Reno's jellyton contraption.

Heero: It's a different color…

Reno: Nah, last time t was lemon-lime, this is strawberry banana.

Duo: And that affects this how?

Reno: That's quite simple. The artificial flavoring and color is a changed variable, and gives the extra umph we need to do this! And that its run off a car battery…

Kali: What! If you did all that last time with a 9 volt, what's gonna happen now?

Reno: Who knows? _throws Brian and Quatre in _AND with two people this time. _flips switch._

Brian: RENO!!! YOU WILL DI- _disappears_

Kali: RENO! Why send Brian?

Reno: _shrugs_ I just thought It'd be funny…

Kali: _smacks Reno_

Reno: _ on floor_

Voice: Where the hell are we???

Reno: _ looks to see both the Yu Yu Hakusho and the Kenshin casts looking around confused._

Kali: COOL! It's Yuske! And Kurama! YAY!

Reno: _ sees Kenshin_ OMG! He looks just like my plushie _pounces_

Kenshin: _on ground with swirlies in his eyes_

Reno: And Sano-chan! _ goes and pokes him_

Yahiko: Baka! You are worse than Sano and Kenshin.

Reno: Oh great, the annoying brat came.

Hiei: Good God, we are stuck in baka-world, Kuaubara should live here. He'd fit in fine.

Kuabara: What? You little punk…

Duo: Dear God he's so short. He makes Kenshin look tall.

Hiei: _glares at Duo_ You will die you braided baka!

Duo: HEY!

Kali: Hi Kurama!

Kurama: Hello there.

Heero: _ pulls out gun and points it at kurama_ Touch her and die.

Reno: _grabs gun_ We don't need to be in the hospital again.

Kali: You ain't kiddin.

Reno: OMG It's Kouyru!! _drools and attempts to pounce just to get hit in the head._

Kouyru: Stay away!

Sano: He must be blind to like that.

Yahiko: You ain't joking, so ugly and fat.

Kaoyru: What was that? _starts throwing random things_

Kurama: Kali, let's separate them until we figure out what's going on.

Kali: Totally.

Kali and Kurama separate everyone, who is now are sitting around the jellyton time transit.

Yuske: What the hell is this thing?

Reno: Can't you see? It's jello, or for you feudal era people, it's a delicious snack that is like jelly. It's hooked up to a power source which is run by peanut butter which causes a time flow which counteracts to the electron flow in the human body turning you into time traveling peanut butter and jelly humans. Which is how the two groups _ points to Kenshin and Yuske_ got here.

All: Huh?

Yuske: We turned into peanut butter and jelly?

Reno: NO! You were turned into TIME TRAVELING peanut butter and jelly.

Yuske: Whatever.

Kali: _sniffle_ I miss Brian.

Kurama: _touches Kali's shoulder_ It will be alright.

Heero: _ growls at Kurama_

Photon: So how do we get home?

Reno: Well, I need more peanut butter…

Kali: Huh?

Reno: To the store we go!

At store

Sales person: Sorry, we're out of peanut butter.

Next store

Manager: We're out!

10 stores later

Cashier: We're out of peanut butter. Some weird guy came and bought all our peanut butter.

Kali: _glares at Reno_ Reno…

Reno: Oops…

Yuske: So what now?

Kali: _looks around _ I know! Buy all the Reeses!

Reno: Huh?

Kali: Reeses PEANUT BUTTER cups?

Reno: Aha! I have an idea!

Kali: What?

Reno: We can buy all stores out of Reeses cups!

Kali: That was my idea!

Reno: Nu uh!!!

Kali: _hits him_ Lets go.

5 hours later, all are squeezing peanut butter out of Reeses cups.

Kurama: This is tedious work.

Yuske: _sleeping_

Photon: Idiot.

Reno: _ sitting squeezing the Reeses cups_ I do hope you guys realize that this is the wrong type of peanut butter.

All: _ freeze and slowly turn to Reno_ WHAT!!! YOU MADE US DO THIS WORK FOR NOTHING!?_ all attack Reno at the same time. A huge dust cloud forms._

Reno: _crawls out of cloud_ Well that's all for today! Stay tuned to see how everyone gets home!

Kali: There he is!!! _ all attack Reno again._

The End


End file.
